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Aubrey Plaza

2011.09.08 01:02 Aubrey Plaza

For fans of the actress/comedian Aubrey Plaza. Pics, vids, news, quotes, trivia. 18+ only.
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2014.07.25 22:53 bunnyhat3 The Pefect Size

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2010.07.09 23:46 Kate Beckinsale

A subreddit for fans of Kate Beckinsale
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2020.05.13 14:32 madoto-78 The second we saw him we all fell in love

It felt like the whole world stopped when he walked into our bookstore. All the customers turned from browsing the shelves, paying for their purchases, sipping their coffees at the Bookshop Café. The barista boggled behind the coffee machine, the cashier stared with their scanner still in hand.
“Oh my god,” Scott, my co-worker at the information desk whispered, dropping a bunch of books to the counter.
I was immediately blindsided by the person, hit with a dizzying feelings of love. I wanted to protect him, stroke his soft black hair, wrap him up in my arms. I wanted to kiss him all over his lovely face. If anyone else touched them, I might just go insane, I might just rip them to shreds with my bare hands. I didn’t want him to leave, I wanted to stay in his presence forever.
He wandered over to the colouring books. He flicked through them, with a slight smile as his fingers danced across the pages. Then he looked over at the racks full of arty postcards. He picked up a Starry Night one and gazed at it with his sleepy looking doe eyes. Everyone watched him in silence. Then he looked up, noticing the stares. Immediately, he put the book and the postcard back down and strode as fast as he could out of the store again. He’d only been there for a minute but it had felt like hours. As the door shut behind him, it felt like the whole building released the breath it was holding.
I staggered away from the counter and hid in the staff breakroom. As soon as he’d left I felt like a wave of depression hit me. I needed to see him again, right now, now, now. What was happening to me? I mean, I was pretty damn sure I was straight. I’d never had feelings for another man before. This didn’t feel like a normal crush either. This felt like I’d been injected with a hit of love potion straight into my bloodstream. I was coated in sweat and I felt almost feverish. Wrenching the freezer open, I stuck my head in, feeling the cold air cool me down.
Just relax, just relax, I told myself. So you’ve had your first man-crush. There’s no need to freak the fuck out about it.
I slowly breathed in and then out before removing my head from the freezer. I just had to get back to my work routine and I’d feel better. I checked the fridge, finding we were out of milk. That would be a good distraction. Leaving the staff room, I went through the book shelves towards the café that adjoined the shop. Most of the women I passed had dreamy looks on their faces and a lot of the men appeared just as shaken and confused as me, sitting down, staring into their hands like they were going through a personal crisis. Passing the cashier, Morgan, I saw she had the same disturbed look on her face as most of the male customers.
I entered the café. At the front table by the counter was Ray, the delivery guy who brought the books in and took orders off to customers. He spent every lunch break in the café flirting with the barista Kelly. I didn’t get along with either of them. Ray was a frat boy douche and Kelly was just as obnoxious. So in other words, they were perfect for each other.
Ray’s fists were clenched, jaw set, staring down into his cup of coffee like it had called his mother a bitch. Kelly was standing next to the toaster oven with a slightly dazed look on her face.
“Hi,” I said and they both jumped. “We’ve run out of milk, just grabbing some.”
“I was miles away,” said Kelly, as I went behind the counter. “God, did you see that guy? He’s not even my type…”
“I don’t think you’re his type either,” Ray cut in and we both looked around at him. “I mean, what guy flounces around like that, looked like he had mascara on the fuckin’ fairy.”
He crossed his arms across his chest. His eyes were simmering with a mixture of discomfort and anger.
“Wow, did we just go back in time twenty years?” I said. “Maybe we should take him to a conversion camp where he belongs huh?”
“He was just joking, Devin, chill,” Kelly snapped at once.
“Oh yes, he’s really just a fountain of wit, the biggest wit I’ve ever met,” I replied as I grabbed a carton of milk from the fridge and went to walk off.
“You shouldn’t speak to paying customers like that, I could report you!” Ray yelled after me.
As I went into the break room to put the milk away, I found Scott sitting at the table looking wide eyed and extremely agitated.
“You don’t understand, something’s wrong,” he whispered to me as I put the milk in the fridge. “Devin, I’ve never ever had romantic or sexual feelings for anyone in my life. I just spoke to Morgan and she’s really goddamned dazed and confused as well, she liked him too!”
“Morgan has a girlfriend?” I said and Scott nodded.
“Why is some stranger getting everyone, everyone no matter if they’re a straight man, gay woman, asexual person, why is he getting them all to fall in love with him? Something’s not fucking right here.”
“What, you think he’s an incubus or something?” I said, raising my eyebrow. Scott threw his hands up.
“Maybe?” he said. “I don’t care if I sound crazy, this whole situation is crazy!”
He took a deep breath, rubbing his arms like his skin was itching off his bones.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “This is just very unnatural for me. I don’t like it. I feel so goddamn uncomfortable right now.”
The phone rang at the information desk and I left Scott to himself so he could settle down. The bookshop was beginning to calm but there was a confused buzzing energy in the air, everyone exchanging looks with each other, or whispering behind their hands. It was like that for the rest of the shift.
When it was time to leave, I bought a carton of orange and poppy seed muffins from Kelly before I headed to my car. I live in a dying tourist town. Back in the good old days, we had hundreds of visitors to our national park to admire the beautiful waterfall, surrounding bushlands and wildlife. But two huge disasters had happened that had scared away all tourists. An oil spill had turned the waterfall into a disgusting black sludge, rotted the grass and trees and killed animals left and right. It had been left a disgusting wasteland for years and just recently had it slowly begun to heal again.
No-one ever owned up to causing the oil spill either. We had no idea who was responsible. There was an infamous image attached to our town, a picture from the papers of a bunch of dead deer and birds by the river that was floating with dead fish.
I drove out of the main street and up the hill past the ruins of the national park, until I reached my Aunt Noelle’s big old country house next to the school. I still lived with her even though I had money to move out. She’d been laid off from her job as a primary school teacher for bullshit reasons. The new principal had said she was ‘going dotty’ even though Aunt Noelle had always been eccentric. She couldn’t afford for me to move out and I owed it to her to stay and help out with the bills.
When I pulled into the driveway, my Aunt looked up from the kitchen window. She waved as I got out of the car.
“I brought those muffins you like,” I said as I walked in.
“Oh lordy, lordy I’m a lucky duck today,” said Aunt Noelle as she wiped her hands on the dishtowel, turning away from the sink. “I don’t have to cook at all tonight! Philippa came over with this odd little stew thingy-ma-jig called Ozza Bucka.”
“Osso Bucco,” I corrected her. Aunt Noelle was the type who thought black pepper was spicy, but she was still interested in trying all these ‘wild’ food like brie cheese and sundried tomatoes.
“Yes that’s the one, it looks very peculiar, but I’m sure we’ll enjoy it!” said Aunt Noelle. “So Phillipa’s daughter Cressida, y’know Cressida who’s with that cashier Morgan at your work, well she was right all along, I did sell a few nice dresses and scarves on the Esky store online!”
“Etsy?” I said as I sat down at the table. She busied around making me a cup of hot chocolate.
“Yes, yes that’s the one,” she said. “Cressida does all the fancy webwork and she sends them all over the world can you believe! My little ol’ dresses might be worn in Korea or Denmark or New Zealand or anywhere!”
“That’s awesome,” I said. She nodded with excitement. Although she was loving and affectionate, Aunt Noelle was incredibly self-centred never interested in anyone else’s life but her own. I didn’t mind though, I liked that she never pried into my business.
Later that night we were watching recorded tapes of 80s soap operas, that I secretly enjoyed myself when my dad rang my phone. I got up to take the call.
“Do you want me to pause it?” yelled my Aunt as I went into my room.
“No thanks, I’ve already seen it a hundred times!” I yelled back.
“Days of Our Lives?” asked Dad teasingly.
“You know it,” I replied. “How’s it going in there?”
“Oh yeah just fuckin’ great,” he said. I heard one of the guards yell, “Watch your language, Angel!”
“Sorry, darlin’,” my dad murmured back and I laughed at the old joke.
“Cheers for the father’s day gift,” he said. “I got to hide it so the boys don’t nick it.”
“Why would any inmate want one of my paintings?” I asked.
“I dunno, wipe their arse with it,” he replied. “Everyone always wants whatever you have that they don’t. I could have a toothpick and ten blokes would wanna nick it. Ridiculous.”
He laughed bitterly.
“Anyway tell me about ya day at the bookshop,” he said. “That bitchy barista give ya grief?”
“No, it was kind of a weird day actually,” I said. “This man walked in and everyone fell in love with him at once. Even Scott who’s asexual, Morgan the cashier who’s a lesbian and me and that douchebag Ray and we’re both straight. Scott thinks he was an incubus or something.”
I expected a laugh from my dad. But there was a long silence instead. I stared down at my phone for a second, thinking I might have accidentally hung up on him.
“Hello?” I said. “You still there?”
There was a cough from the other line, a nasty smoker’s cough that I’d grown up with my whole life.
“What he look like?” he said in a gruff voice.
“Uhh,” I replied, confused at his strangely serious tone. “Black hair, big hazel eyes, y’know a pretty boy, like he’d be in a picture a teenage girl would pin up on her wall or something.”
Dad was quiet again. I heard a guard yell, “time’s up, Angel, move along.”
“Gotta go,” he muttered.
“Okay,” I replied, feeling more baffled than ever.
Normally a person like Aunt Noelle would be the craziest in someone’s family, but she was nothing compared to my parents. When someone says that their parents are crazy I just have to laugh. I don’t think anyone can compete with mine.
Oscar Angel or as he was known in the media, the Angel of Death had been in jail my whole life. I remember growing up and eavesdropping on Aunt Noelle and Philippa gossiping in the lounge room over tea and biscuits. Philippa had asked in a hushed whisper if I was a conjugal baby and I’d seen through the crack of the door my Aunt nod. My mother apparently had been one of these prisoner groupies, like the ones who wrote fan-mail to Bundy and Manson. My mum ran off on me leaving me with my Aunt when I was a baby. Like her sister, my mother was incredibly self-centred but she had no redeeming qualities to make up for it.
My father was the second disaster that had destroyed all tourist interest in our town. My Dad was in jail for kidnapping four men, taking them up into the bushland, letting them loose and then hunting them all down. There’d only been one survivor who told the cops. My dad had pleaded guilty and been put in jail for life. Kids at school taunted me for having a slasher villain for a dad. There’d actually been a few crappy horror films and true crime documentaries based on him and that was what drew the trickle of tourists to us nowadays, just people wanting to see the place where it had all happened. It was like being related to a celebrity in the worst kind of way. The interviews made me a fair bit of money though. I trolled the reporters, saying the spirits of the dead men haunted my nightmares, making my hands shake and my eye twitch. Dad told me he'd piss himself laughing when they played them on the TV in the rec room.
He sent me presents for my birthday, carved rocks and woodwork in the shapes of dragons. Aunt Noelle always took me to see him and I remember him picking me up as a toddler and twirling me around in a hug. I’d tell him I’d been doing well at school or showed him a drawing I’d done and he’d beam with pride. No-one ever lied to me or tried to soften the story. I’d always grown up knowing he was in jail cause he was a bad man who killed people. Yet I still loved him.
“What did your father say?” Aunt Noelle asked, peering excitedly into the room. I knew she wanted juicy titbits to whisper about with Philippa. It was one of the reasons she took me down to the prison as a kid, so she’d have a few days’ worth of gossip with everyone in town who’d listen.
“A man had to be taken to the nursing unit today,” I said. “He got stabbed with a toothpick.”
“Oh my good goodness,” said Aunt Noelle, clutching her chest. “Wait til I tell Philippa, she’ll kneel over, I swear!”
After a shower and Aunt Noelle’s chamomile tea, I bustled myself off to bed.
In my dreams, I was strolling down the riverbank, the crash of the waterfall ahead of me. Yet it wasn’t like it was today, full of dead grass, black trees and foul smelling water. I could smell flowers in the air and my bare feet squished through the wet green grass. The water was clear, fish swimming around the mossy bottom, the waterfall spilling white foam down on the slick black rocks. Birds were chittering in the distance and the air was warm and pleasant. I felt totally at ease.
I could hear a soft singing beneath the roar of the water.
On the other side of the river, lying in a bed of yellow daisies was a figure, the sun shining off his peachy skin, reflecting in his black hair. The huge hazel eyes opened, the light throwing it into a kaleidoscope of green, brown, gold and amber.
I put my foot into the warm water of the river. I was going to join him. I took off my shirt and dropped my pants, the fabric being swept away down the stream. If only that bird in the tree would stop chirping like that. As I swam naked towards the other end of the river, I realized it wasn’t a bird. It was an alarm and I was lying in my bed.
I gasped staring at my bedroom ceiling. At first I felt annoyed at being woken before the good stuff happened. Then I felt slightly in shock with myself. I’d had naughty dreams about girls when I was in high school. I wasn’t that creative, I mainly dreamt about motor boating Mila Kunis and Angelina Jolie. I’d never had a sex dream about a man before.
As I got ready for work, the shock turned to guilt. I couldn’t look anyone in the eye as I arrived at the bookshop that morning. Maybe they’d look at my face and just know what I’d dreamed about the night before. In the break-room I tore open a muesli bar as Scott made himself his morning coffee. We still had a little while until the store opened
“I can’t believe it Devin,” Scott said to me, shaking his head. “I had my first ever wet dream over Inky…”
“Why Inky?” I asked.
“Cause he’s an incubus,” Scott replied with a shrug. “I posted about him on my twitter, you should bloody know! How dare you not follow me Judas.”
“I don’t have any of the twits and grams and books and snaps, you know that,” I replied.
“You like your social media as antisocial as possible,” he said.
“You know it,” I replied and we both laughed. He stared into my shifty eyes and then grinned.
“You had an Inky dream too!” he said. “Holy shit I bet everyone who saw him yesterday did. The laundrette’s gonna be full to the brim, everyone needs to wash their dirty sheets…”
“Classy,” I said. Kelly walked through the door, dumping her bag in one of the lockers.
“Nearly broke my finger last night thinking about Inky,” she said with a giggle.
“Thanks I didn’t want to eat anyway,” I said, putting down my muesli bar. Scott took a seat, settling in to watch us argue. He said our banter was what brought him to work every day. He never bothered even engaging with Kelly and sometimes I wished I could do the same.
“Don’t be such a prude!” she said to me as she got an apple from her bag. “You all wanked off to him as well, don’t even lie.”
Scott wrinkled up his nose at her.
“I don’t normally go for like sissy looking guys y’know, but he like did something to me, I dunno. I’d destroy him oh my god, I’d give him the fuck of his life. Where do you think he lives? Next time he’s here I should follow him home…”
“Yeah I think that’s called stalking,” I said. Scott muffled a laugh.
“Good point, don’t want to share a cell with your Dad do I?” Kelly replied.
“You don’t have to worry about that, I’m not sure if you know this but they actually have separate prisons for men and women? Unless you have a very well-kept secret of course.”
“They’re not gonna arrest me for following a guy home, that’s insane Devin, God,” Kelly snapped at once. “Like maybe if I was a creep like you, yeah but I’m a girl so…”
“Hurray for double standards,” I said.
“Fuck off,” she said. “You’re just mad that I have the balls to ask someone out or at least take them into my car and fuck their brains out. You see a pretty girl you just hide in here like you always do. I mean when’s the last time you actually went on a date?”
“Oh yes, yes we’re all just burning with jealousy over you, Kelly,” I said trying to hide the fact that her remark had actually stung a bit.
“Ignore the question then,” Kelly said, looking rather pleased with herself. She didn’t often win our verbal spats. She quickly hurried from the room before I could possibly get another word in.
“Poor form, Devin,” said Scott. “I hope you’re not losing your touch, I’ll quit if you and Kelly stop having your fights. It’s like Tyrion versus Cersei.”
“C’mon you flatter me too much, I’m no way near as cool as Tyrion,” I said.
“But Kelly’s as bad as Cersei then?” said Scott. I just shrugged and Scott laughed.
Later on I didn’t really feel like having lunch in the staff breakroom so I went outside to eat. It was good to get a bit of exercise and fresh air as I hiked up the hill towards the park. Like I said, in the past ten years the area had begun to recover slightly. Around the river and waterfall was still pretty disgusting but the bushlands that led that way had cleared, grass and flowers slowly beginning to bloom again. The tourists were still afraid to return so it was always quiet. I found it a nice place to sit by myself.
As I sat down on the bench and opened my container of left-over ozzo bucco, I felt a tingle on the back of my neck. I could hear a soft voice gently singing out a song. Turning around I saw sitting cross-legged in a flowerbed the man from yesterday. A stray cat that would always hiss and claw if you came near it, was curled up in his lap and he was scratching it behind the ears. I boggled at him and he looked up. When he caught eyes with me, I felt myself flush and my heart flutter. His shoulders went up under his ears, his body stiffened and a look of fear crossed his face. He was scared of me.
I watched as he carefully put the cat down, who meowed unhappily at him. He walked as fast as he could in the direction of the waterfall, disappearing around a corner.
People started to see him every day. He’d be staring up at the mural in the carpark behind the main street, or sitting on a bench with the stray cat in his lap, or in the park admiring the flowers. I didn’t approach him, but many others tried. He’d always get up and scarper off the second he saw someone coming near. Every time he’d run in the direction of the waterfall.
About a week after we’d first spotted Inky, I went to the mailbox in the morning to find I’d gotten a letter from my Dad. I put it in my jacket pocket and forgot about it for the rest of the day.
I went to the bar that night. The bookstore staff often caught up for drinks Fridays and Saturdays. Ray and Kelly were making a ruckus in the front room. Ray was even more annoying than usual as Kelly giggled at his every word, perched on his knee.
“Why don’t we have the fuckin’ footy playin’ c’mon this is bullshit…!” he was yelling at the bartender.
“Go to the pub if you’re so mad, man…?” the bartender tried to say.
“No, no, don’t goddamn brush me off why can’t you have it here huh? This whole place with ya fruity fuckin’ drinks and entrees, fuckin’ hire me, I’ll put in a stripper pole, topless waitresses, run this place properly.”
He groped at Kelly’s tits.
“I already got my first employee right here!”
“Oh my god, I’m not being a stripper what the fuck!” Kelly laughed as she spilled her cocktail down her front. The bartender rolled his eyes, turning away from them to serve me. The one thing me and Kelly had in common that got me a lot of mockery was our taste in booze. I ordered a cosmopolitan as Ray sneered at me.
“Take me out back and shoot me if I ever drink one of them willingly,” he said as he took a swig of his pint of beer.
“Wow willingly that’s a big word for you isn’t it, three entire syllables!” I replied, taking my drink. Ray’s eyes flashed dangerously and he tried to rise out of his seat, obviously forgetting he still had Kelly in his lap. She shrieked, throwing her arms around his neck, spilling the rest of her drink down his back. Ray swore at the top of his lungs.
"That's it, you're out of here, the pair of youse…!” the bartender snapped as I slunk towards the smoking area. It was an ugly cement area next to the bins. I wasn’t a smoker but I preferred sitting back here. It was where I found the best conversation. There was a few people gathered around and I had a quick glance to see if there were any mates about. I spotted Morgan and Cress sitting on milk crates, having a smoke. I went to them, pulling over a keg to sit on.
“Drinking your fruit juice again?” Morgan said as I sat down.
“Oi this has a mad high alcohol content compared to your watered down wheat runoff,” I said.
“Is that a scientific term, mad high?” said Morgan.
“You know it,” I said. “Your alcohol content is classified as piss poor.”
Morgan laughed. I turned to Cress who was staring up at the night sky.
“You got Aunt Noelle all in a tizzy over her Esky store,” I said and Cress blinked slowly and then laughed.
“Sorry, I had a cheeky joint before I got here I don’t know up from down,” she said, shaking her head. “I been thinking about Inky.”
“Haven’t we all,” I said as Morgan shifted uncomfortably on the spot.
“God that was bizarre,” Morgan said. “I’ve been a dead set lesbo my whole life and Inky walks in and makes me question everything. How does someone fuck with everyone’s sexuality all at once? You notice Ray trying to act as hetero as possible out front? Poor fucker’s rattled as all hell just like all of us.”
Cress waved her hand around dismissively at this.
“Naw I wasn’t no rattlesnake,” said Cress. “See, when he walked past my storefront I got the nerves at first but then I saw everyone else got hit, realized it was just a love spell and it didn’t mean nothing y’know.”
“Scott reckons he’s an incubus,” I said and Cress snorted, rolling her eyes.
“Bullshit,” she said. “Scott don’t know nothing.”
I raised an eyebrow at her.
“Listen,” said Cress clicking her fingers. “I run the spiritual shop, I know my shit. Incubus? Nah man, nah way. He can’t be an incubus, he’s not done any seducin’, he goes and scrams the minute any of us see 'im. And the dreams don’t fit the description either. If a cubi can’t seduce you in the real world, they go into your dreams, screw you silly and leave you exhausted and drained of all your energy, they steal your bread batter and put buns in ovens. I asked around, no-one’s had any dreams where he took their bread batter or took ‘em to pound town. No takin’ bread batter, no puttin’ buns in oven, no seducin’. He ain’t no incubus. Unless he stole your batter, Devin?”
I muffled laughter as she took a puff from her cigarette to recover from her rant.
“Nah he didn’t steal my bread batter, Cress,” I said as Morgan bit back a smirk.
“Anyway,” said Morgan. “I thought the whole incubus and succubus myth was just people not understanding sleep paralysis.”
“Boo,” said Cress at once, elbowing her.
“Yeah fuck your rational scientific explanation,” I piped in.
Morgan put her hands up in defeat.
“Deepest apologies,” she said. “I’m gonna get another drink, youse want anything?”
I shook my head no as Cress got up as well.
The couple walked out of the smoking area leaving me alone. It was chilly out and I tucked my hands into my jacket pocket. There was a rustle and I realized I’d forgotten to read Dad’s letter. I took out the wrinkled papers. I blinked. There were about half a dozen grey-lead pencil drawings inside, along with a scrawled letter.
I went through the pictures, feeling cold fingers of unease tickling up my spine. The first drawing was of an alleyway and bins. There was a figure crouched down with a few cats around them, tickling one under the chin. He had familiar dark, soft looking hair and sweet innocent eyes. It was Inky.
The next picture was of Inky curled up naked in the grass. His face was contorted and black liquid was dribbling from his eyes, nose and mouth. The third picture was of the figure now dressed in a baggy plaid shirt and jeans, hugging his knees to his chest and burying his face away. The fourth was nearly the same except Inky was looking up, staring from the paper with tear-filled eyes. The fifth picture was the back of a car with four figures tied up together with burlap sacks over their heads squashed up beside each other.
The final picture was of a forest scene. There was a stake in the ground and a fat, middle-aged man was skewered on it, the stake impaling him through his anus, the pointed end sticking out of his mouth. Above him in the trees was another man, younger with a shaggy beard and hair. His abdomen was torn open and he was hanging from the branches by his intestines. A third man was lying in the soil, his hands chained to a tree trunk, his body smeared with a sticky looking substance. I couldn’t make out his features as his flesh were crawling with ants and flies that were eating him alive. I could see in the far distance, the familiar figure of Inky, looking over the scene with his mouth hanging open, his miserable face dripping with black liquid.
At the bottom of each drawing was my Dad’s scrawled signature.
“What’s that you’re reading?” said Morgan as she walked back outside. “Cress’s abandoned me to dance, you’re left with my wonderful company now.”
I didn’t answer and her cheerful look changed to confusion.
“You alright mate?” she said as she sat down beside her. I gave her the pictures with shaking hands. She looked over them one by one, the colour slowly draining from her face, her eyes boggling wider and wider until they looked the size of ping-pong balls.
“You’re dad drew these?” she whispered. I nodded, my whole body feeling numb. Her eyes flicked over to the letter I was still holding.
“What’s it say?” she said and I looked down at the messy scrawl. I offered it to her so we could both read. She frowned, shaking her head.
“Sorry,” she said. “I can’t make head or tails of that.”
I’d forgotten that most people couldn’t read my dad’s chicken scratch writing and bad spelling. I started to read it for her, my voice trembling.
“Dear Devin,” I said. “They’re letting me send you these cause it ain’t new information, I already told the cops all about this when I was arrested. They didn’t believe half of it but I swear it’s fucking true. I know about that man you were talking about. I never thought I’d hear about him again. I could barely believe it when you told me. Let me tell you everything.”
“In the 60s I worked as a handyman at a hotel in town. It was a fancy art hotel, had all these paintings on the wall. I was there to fix elevators and phones and TVs and all that shit.”
“Look I’ve been in jail for bloody decades surrounded by men twenty-four seven and I ain’t never been tempted to do anything with any of them. Never had a problem with blokes who swing that way either, it just ain’t for me. I always thought I was straight as an arrow but there was one exception what made me question meself. The fella what visited the hotel every time we changed the art on the walls who’d come down and admire it for hours, who I saw feeding the strays out in the alleyway. I was bloody besotted. Frightened me it did, didn’t know what the hell was happening to me.”
“Everyone in the hotel loved him too. He never booked a room for himself and didn’t speak a word so we didn’t know his name. Everyone called him Baby. I tended to just avoid Baby if he came into the hotel, didn’t want to confront these bloody feelings y’know it wasn’t like today, you could get arrested, put in the loony bin, your reputation ruined for liking blokes.”
"Now I knew one of the concierges was dodgy, we all did. He could get a guest anything they wanted for a bit of extra cash. I didn’t stick my nose in, cause I didn’t think it was too serious. He’d just get the drugs and hookers to the guests and all that. I started hearing rumours he was getting worse. Starting to send drugged up women to rooms, children for creeps. But he kept his tracks squeaky clean and there wasn’t any evidence he’d done a thing wrong. He looked like such a little harmless punk I didn’t believe he’d get into that really evil business. I just thought naw it’s gossip is all.”
“One day I was fixing the fridge in a room belonging to these three business men when I heard whispering. I didn’t know what it meant and was too focused to really pay it much attention. All I heard was “help us get him to our room and you can join in.”’
“I wished I’d paid proper attention, enough to fuckin’ stop them. But I didn’t. All hell broke loose that night. The concierge came back from his dinner break as cool as a cucumber and then five minutes later the hotel collapsed.”
“The marble staircase cracked right down the middle. All the paintings fell off the walls, all the windows and chandeliers shattered and the ceiling caved in. I was running for the front entrance when I saw this huge river of black oil flooding down the broken staircase. It was making this awful sound, like a widow at a funeral. I’d never heard something so heartbroken in my life. It crashed out onto the street and swept off and away. We were lucky to be in an off-season so no-one died, but quite a few were injured.”
“I followed the black stain all the way through town and up into the woods. That’s where I found Baby, curled up and naked. He was absolutely traumatized, wouldn’t speak a word to me, oozing black oil from his mouth. I stayed with him. Wouldn’t go near enough to touch him cause I’d figured out what the men had done and knew he wouldn’t want another bloke to lay a finger on him. But I gave him a new set of clothes, gave him food and drink, kept guard as he slept and said comforting things when he woke up from nightmares. I took care of him.”
“He didn’t get better. The nightmares got worse, he couldn’t keep food down. He was wasting away and the woods were just rotting to bits around him. The trees trunks were full of maggots and the ground was this stinking mud and all the fish in the river floated up dead to the surface. I felt furious at these fucking mongrels who done it to him. So then well, you know what I did to them don’t ya?”
“I was fucking nuts, I thought, look what I did for you, this will make you feel better. The look on Baby’s face. He was crying, turning away to vomit up the black oil. I tried to go to him and he cowered like a kicked dog. Terrified, he was terrified of me. Baby ran into the woods and I never saw him again. But I heard him crying that widow’s wail, echoing all through the forest. I wanted to die. I wanted to throw myself into the river and drown. I’d buried the concierge alive but he managed to dig himself out and run to the cops. I didn’t resist. I let them arrest me, convict me and put me away.”
“Funnily enough the concierge is in here with me now. Years after I was convicted, the law caught up with him. In here for a fuckload of fucked up shit. They keep us separated though, obviously scared I’m gonna try to kill him again. Little weaselly scumbag.”
“But I loved my Baby with all my heart and soul. I still do. I pray he’ll forgive me. But I know he never will. I can’t forgive myself either. The only good thing that’s come out of all of this is having you, Devin. If not for you I think I would have hung meself years ago. ”
“So that’s it I guess. I couldn’t tell you this all in a visit or a phone call, you understand. Had to write it down. Love ya kiddo. From your psycho bastard Dad.”
I put the letter down and Morgan and I just stared at each other. The other people in the smoking area seemed far away, the world just focused in on just me, Morgan and the letter in my hands.
“But he’s back,” I said in a croaky voice. “Dad said it was the 60s? Baby, Inky whatever it is, still looks like he’s in his mid to late twenties? How’s that possible?”
“Obviously he’s not human,” Morgan muttered back, looking completely dazed. “I don’t know what the hell he is.”
We became aware of a lot of excited whispering among the smoker’s area. People were getting up to run off into the front room. Morgan and I exchanged looks and got up to follow the crowd. Groups of people were gathered around the windows and front door, peering out into the street.
“What’s happening?” I asked Cress, who was spinning a pen on the countertop.
“Inky sighting,” she replied with a shrug. I saw across the road, the slender shape wandering down the pavement, looking around himself with his usual slightly sleepy expression. A big sigh went through the people in the building, people smiling sappily, their clasped hands beneath the chins.
“Such an angel…” someone said.
We all watched as he turned the corner. He was heading for the mural in the carpark again. When he was out of eyesight, the admiring onlookers dispersed, going back to the bar or trickling into the smoker’s area again. Morgan and I hovered by the door. In the distance, I could hear a faint yelling.
“I saw him, I saw that little fairy, he was just here a second ago!” Ray’s voice rang out down the road. “I just wanna talk to him, I just wanna fuckin’ talk!”
Kelly, laughing with a bottle in one hand and her shoes in the other was staggering a few paces behind him.
“You’re crazy!” she kept saying, zigzagging down the pavement. “You’re crazy Ray!”
They went around the corner in the direction of the carpark.
“Cress we gotta go,” Morgan said at once.
“Why what’s going on?” Cress replied, looking up from her pen spinning.
“You explain,” I said to Morgan, shoving the letter and drawings into her hand. “I’ll go.”
I raced down into the cold, dark street, my breath heavy, my heart in my chest. I remembered the pictures of Inky curled up naked, crying with oil spilling down his face. The back seat full of the tied up, hooded men. I imagined the scream as the downfall of black oil exploded over the white marble of the hotel staircase.
The mural was lit by a golden streetlight, taking up an entire wall, depicting the waterfall back before it had been polluted. It had bright, glittering blue water, surrounded by a rainbow of flowers and wild deer pranced through the emerald green of the riverbank.
Inky had his fingertips just grazing the painting as he slowly looked it over. His face was slightly furrowed as he stroked the painted brick.
“Fuckin’ poof!” yelled Ray, staggering across the carpark. “I bet ya wanna fuckin’ suck me off don’t ya you little fuckin’…”
Then he fell over sideways into the bushes, crumpling to the ground. He struggled to get to his feet, swearing and thrashing about like an upended turtle. Then he just gave up, curling up in the fetal position in the bushes, sticking his thumb in his mouth. In five seconds he was fast asleep and snoring.
Kelly had completely forgotten about Ray as she swayed over towards Inky.
“I’m just gonna smack his arse is all,” Kelly slurred into her drink. “I wanna grab it so bad. Maybe grab his dick too. Look he’s a skinny little thing, not like he’s gonna push me off, is he? And look he’s a man, all men want it. I’m gonna make Inky’s goddamn night.”
I barged towards her, getting in her way and she instantly pushed my chest trying to get around me.
“For fuck’s sake,” I said. “Kelly have you lost your mind? Jesus.”
I grabbed her by the shoulder and for a second a dark urge stirred in my chest. I wanted to grab her by the hair and smash her stupid face into the brick wall. Smash it until the brains leaked out. Grab the bottle and break it over her head.
“Get off me, just chill, just fuckin’ chill,” she said, fighting against my grip. “You’re insane! Let me go!”
I could do it. I could pull out a chunk of her hair, gouge my fingers into her eyes until they bled, stab my keys into her ear and rupture the eardrum. I could feel my breath heavy in my chest and Kelly looked into my eyes. She stopped struggling and just went still. The bottle smashed to the ground beneath us. I saw the terror in her face, heard the tiny whimper in her throat.
There was a sound behind me. It was a low, long and agonized moan of utter misery and fear.
My hand dangled down by my side.
“Just go home alright,” I managed to say. “Just sleep it off.”
Kelly nodded, tears streaming down her face. Over at the bushes, Morgan and Cress were helping Ray to his feet as he muttered about how he wanted to be the meat in their lesbian sandwich.
“Alrighty girlie,” Cress called to Kelly. “You come with us now, we walk ya drunk mess home.”
Sending a fearful look over her shoulder at me, Kelly nearly ran towards them. Morgan sent me a stiff nod as the four of them started heading down the street together, leaving me behind. Feeling like I was underwater in an ice cold pool, I slowly turned around.
The creature was standing stock still in the middle of the carpark. His hands were shaking and his eyes were filled with black liquid. I could see an oily black trail seeping from the corner of his mouth down his chin. But he wasn’t wailing anymore.
I felt the shame twist my insides. I’d helped to terrify him into that state. My skin felt cold and I was trembling all over. Would I have really done it? If I hadn’t had heard the crying, what would I have done to Kelly?
I brushed my own tears from my eyes and turned to puke up into the nearest bush. The acid burned my throat, my body cramped and my stomach heaved as I retched endlessly. It seemed like hours had passed when I’d manage to throw everything up. I wiped my mouth on the back on my hand and staggered to my feet again. Turning around to look behind me, I saw the creature had gone.
Kelly called in sick for the next few days. No-one saw Inky either. He’d gone back into hiding it seemed. Finally around Thursday, while I was eating breakfast in the break-room, Kelly slunk through the door. I watched her out of the corner of my eye as she silently put her bag away.
“Hey,” Kelly murmured. “Thanks for the other night. I nearly did something really stupid.”
“Yeah you did,” I responded at once. I knew she was trying to extend an olive branch to me but being sarcastic to her was just second nature. Kelly cast her eyes down and didn’t answer. Then she silently nodded in agreement and hurried out of the break-room again. I went back to my bowl of muesli.
“Look Devin,” Scott said when he came in, showing me his phone. “Apparently the waterfall is cleaner then it’s been since the oil spill. Everyone’s in goddamn shock, it’s mending so fast out of absolutely nowhere.”
He smiled, shaking his head.
“And all the wild deer have come back too.”
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2020.05.13 10:12 madoto-78 The second we saw him we all fell in love

It felt like the whole world stopped when he walked into our bookstore. All the customers turned from browsing the shelves, paying for their purchases, sipping their coffees at the Bookshop Café. The barista boggled behind the coffee machine, the cashier stared with their scanner still in hand.
“Oh my god,” Scott, my co-worker at the information desk whispered, dropping a bunch of books to the counter.
I was immediately blindsided by the person, hit with a dizzying feelings of love. I wanted to protect him, stroke his soft black hair, wrap him up in my arms. I wanted to kiss him all over his lovely face. If anyone else touched them, I might just go insane, I might just rip them to shreds with my bare hands. I didn’t want him to leave, I wanted to stay in his presence forever.
He wandered over to the colouring books. He flicked through them, with a slight smile as his fingers danced across the pages. Then he looked over at the racks full of arty postcards. He picked up a Starry Night one and gazed at it with his sleepy looking doe eyes. Everyone watched him in silence. Then he looked up, noticing the stares. Immediately, he put the book and the postcard back down and strode as fast as he could out of the store again. He’d only been there for a minute but it had felt like hours. As the door shut behind him, it felt like the whole building released the breath it was holding.
I staggered away from the counter and hid in the staff breakroom. As soon as he’d left I felt like a wave of depression hit me. I needed to see him again, right now, now, now. What was happening to me? I mean, I was pretty damn sure I was straight. I’d never had feelings for another man before. This didn’t feel like a normal crush either. This felt like I’d been injected with a hit of love potion straight into my bloodstream. I was coated in sweat and I felt almost feverish. Wrenching the freezer open, I stuck my head in, feeling the cold air cool me down.
Just relax, just relax, I told myself. So you’ve had your first man-crush. There’s no need to freak the fuck out about it.
I slowly breathed in and then out before removing my head from the freezer. I just had to get back to my work routine and I’d feel better. I checked the fridge, finding we were out of milk. That would be a good distraction. Leaving the staff room, I went through the book shelves towards the café that adjoined the shop. Most of the women I passed had dreamy looks on their faces and a lot of the men appeared just as shaken and confused as me, sitting down, staring into their hands like they were going through a personal crisis. Passing the cashier, Morgan, I saw she had the same disturbed look on her face as most of the male customers.
I entered the café. At the front table by the counter was Ray, the delivery guy who brought the books in and took orders off to customers. He spent every lunch break in the café flirting with the barista Kelly. I didn’t get along with either of them. Ray was a frat boy douche and Kelly was just as obnoxious. So in other words, they were perfect for each other.
Ray’s fists were clenched, jaw set, staring down into his cup of coffee like it had called his mother a bitch. Kelly was standing next to the toaster oven with a slightly dazed look on her face.
“Hi,” I said and they both jumped. “We’ve run out of milk, just grabbing some.”
“I was miles away,” said Kelly, as I went behind the counter. “God, did you see that guy? He’s not even my type…”
“I don’t think you’re his type either,” Ray cut in and we both looked around at him. “I mean, what guy flounces around like that, looked like he had mascara on the fuckin’ fairy.”
He crossed his arms across his chest. His eyes were simmering with a mixture of discomfort and anger.
“Wow, did we just go back in time twenty years?” I said. “Maybe we should take him to a conversion camp where he belongs huh?”
“He was just joking, Devin, chill,” Kelly snapped at once.
“Oh yes, he’s really just a fountain of wit, the biggest wit I’ve ever met,” I replied as I grabbed a carton of milk from the fridge and went to walk off.
“You shouldn’t speak to paying customers like that, I could report you!” Ray yelled after me.
As I went into the break room to put the milk away, I found Scott sitting at the table looking wide eyed and extremely agitated.
“You don’t understand, something’s wrong,” he whispered to me as I put the milk in the fridge. “Devin, I’ve never ever had romantic or sexual feelings for anyone in my life. I just spoke to Morgan and she’s really goddamned dazed and confused as well, she liked him too!”
“Morgan has a girlfriend?” I said and Scott nodded.
“Why is some stranger getting everyone, everyone no matter if they’re a straight man, gay woman, asexual person, why is he getting them all to fall in love with him? Something’s not fucking right here.”
“What, you think he’s an incubus or something?” I said, raising my eyebrow. Scott threw his hands up.
“Maybe?” he said. “I don’t care if I sound crazy, this whole situation is crazy!”
He took a deep breath, rubbing his arms like his skin was itching off his bones.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “This is just very unnatural for me. I don’t like it. I feel so goddamn uncomfortable right now.”
The phone rang at the information desk and I left Scott to himself so he could settle down. The bookshop was beginning to calm but there was a confused buzzing energy in the air, everyone exchanging looks with each other, or whispering behind their hands. It was like that for the rest of the shift.
When it was time to leave, I bought a carton of orange and poppy seed muffins from Kelly before I headed to my car. I live in a dying tourist town. Back in the good old days, we had hundreds of visitors to our national park to admire the beautiful waterfall, surrounding bushlands and wildlife. But two huge disasters had happened that had scared away all tourists. An oil spill had turned the waterfall into a disgusting black sludge, rotted the grass and trees and killed animals left and right. It had been left a disgusting wasteland for years and just recently had it slowly begun to heal again.
No-one ever owned up to causing the oil spill either. We had no idea who was responsible. There was an infamous image attached to our town, a picture from the papers of a bunch of dead deer and birds by the river that was floating with dead fish.
I drove out of the main street and up the hill past the ruins of the national park, until I reached my Aunt Noelle’s big old country house next to the school. I still lived with her even though I had money to move out. She’d been laid off from her job as a primary school teacher for bullshit reasons. The new principal had said she was ‘going dotty’ even though Aunt Noelle had always been eccentric. She couldn’t afford for me to move out and I owed it to her to stay and help out with the bills.
When I pulled into the driveway, my Aunt looked up from the kitchen window. She waved as I got out of the car.
“I brought those muffins you like,” I said as I walked in.
“Oh lordy, lordy I’m a lucky duck today,” said Aunt Noelle as she wiped her hands on the dishtowel, turning away from the sink. “I don’t have to cook at all tonight! Philippa came over with this odd little stew thingy-ma-jig called Ozza Bucka.”
“Osso Bucco,” I corrected her. Aunt Noelle was the type who thought black pepper was spicy, but she was still interested in trying all these ‘wild’ food like brie cheese and sundried tomatoes.
“Yes that’s the one, it looks very peculiar, but I’m sure we’ll enjoy it!” said Aunt Noelle. “So Phillipa’s daughter Cressida, y’know Cressida who’s with that cashier Morgan at your work, well she was right all along, I did sell a few nice dresses and scarves on the Esky store online!”
“Etsy?” I said as I sat down at the table. She busied around making me a cup of hot chocolate.
“Yes, yes that’s the one,” she said. “Cressida does all the fancy webwork and she sends them all over the world can you believe! My little ol’ dresses might be worn in Korea or Denmark or New Zealand or anywhere!”
“That’s awesome,” I said. She nodded with excitement. Although she was loving and affectionate, Aunt Noelle was incredibly self-centred never interested in anyone else’s life but her own. I didn’t mind though, I liked that she never pried into my business.
Later that night we were watching recorded tapes of 80s soap operas, that I secretly enjoyed myself when my dad rang my phone. I got up to take the call.
“Do you want me to pause it?” yelled my Aunt as I went into my room.
“No thanks, I’ve already seen it a hundred times!” I yelled back.
“Days of Our Lives?” asked Dad teasingly.
“You know it,” I replied. “How’s it going in there?”
“Oh yeah just fuckin’ great,” he said. I heard one of the guards yell, “Watch your language, Angel!”
“Sorry, darlin’,” my dad murmured back and I laughed at the old joke.
“Cheers for the father’s day gift,” he said. “I got to hide it so the boys don’t nick it.”
“Why would any inmate want one of my paintings?” I asked.
“I dunno, wipe their arse with it,” he replied. “Everyone always wants whatever you have that they don’t. I could have a toothpick and ten blokes would wanna nick it. Ridiculous.”
He laughed bitterly.
“Anyway tell me about ya day at the bookshop,” he said. “That bitchy barista give ya grief?”
“No, it was kind of a weird day actually,” I said. “This man walked in and everyone fell in love with him at once. Even Scott who’s asexual, Morgan the cashier who’s a lesbian and me and that douchebag Ray and we’re both straight. Scott thinks he was an incubus or something.”
I expected a laugh from my dad. But there was a long silence instead. I stared down at my phone for a second, thinking I might have accidentally hung up on him.
“Hello?” I said. “You still there?”
There was a cough from the other line, a nasty smoker’s cough that I’d grown up with my whole life.
“What he look like?” he said in a gruff voice.
“Uhh,” I replied, confused at his strangely serious tone. “Black hair, big hazel eyes, y’know a pretty boy, like he’d be in a picture a teenage girl would pin up on her wall or something.”
Dad was quiet again. I heard a guard yell, “time’s up, Angel, move along.”
“Gotta go,” he muttered.
“Okay,” I replied, feeling more baffled than ever.
Normally a person like Aunt Noelle would be the craziest in someone’s family, but she was nothing compared to my parents. When someone says that their parents are crazy I just have to laugh. I don’t think anyone can compete with mine.
Oscar Angel or as he was known in the media, the Angel of Death had been in jail my whole life. I remember growing up and eavesdropping on Aunt Noelle and Philippa gossiping in the lounge room over tea and biscuits. Philippa had asked in a hushed whisper if I was a conjugal baby and I’d seen through the crack of the door my Aunt nod. My mother apparently had been one of these prisoner groupies, like the ones who wrote fan-mail to Bundy and Manson. My mum ran off on me leaving me with my Aunt when I was a baby. Like her sister, my mother was incredibly self-centred but she had no redeeming qualities to make up for it.
My father was the second disaster that had destroyed all tourist interest in our town. My Dad was in jail for kidnapping four men, taking them up into the bushland, letting them loose and then hunting them all down. There’d only been one survivor who told the cops. My dad had pleaded guilty and been put in jail for life. Kids at school taunted me for having a slasher villain for a dad. There’d actually been a few crappy horror films and true crime documentaries based on him and that was what drew the trickle of tourists to us nowadays, just people wanting to see the place where it had all happened. It was like being related to a celebrity in the worst kind of way. The interviews made me a fair bit of money though. I trolled the reporters, saying the spirits of the dead men haunted my nightmares, making my hands shake and my eye twitch. Dad told me he'd piss himself laughing when they played them on the TV in the rec room.
He sent me presents for my birthday, carved rocks and woodwork in the shapes of dragons. Aunt Noelle always took me to see him and I remember him picking me up as a toddler and twirling me around in a hug. I’d tell him I’d been doing well at school or showed him a drawing I’d done and he’d beam with pride. No-one ever lied to me or tried to soften the story. I’d always grown up knowing he was in jail cause he was a bad man who killed people. Yet I still loved him.
“What did your father say?” Aunt Noelle asked, peering excitedly into the room. I knew she wanted juicy titbits to whisper about with Philippa. It was one of the reasons she took me down to the prison as a kid, so she’d have a few days’ worth of gossip with everyone in town who’d listen.
“A man had to be taken to the nursing unit today,” I said. “He got stabbed with a toothpick.”
“Oh my good goodness,” said Aunt Noelle, clutching her chest. “Wait til I tell Philippa, she’ll kneel over, I swear!”
After a shower and Aunt Noelle’s chamomile tea, I bustled myself off to bed.
In my dreams, I was strolling down the riverbank, the crash of the waterfall ahead of me. Yet it wasn’t like it was today, full of dead grass, black trees and foul smelling water. I could smell flowers in the air and my bare feet squished through the wet green grass. The water was clear, fish swimming around the mossy bottom, the waterfall spilling white foam down on the slick black rocks. Birds were chittering in the distance and the air was warm and pleasant. I felt totally at ease.
I could hear a soft singing beneath the roar of the water.
On the other side of the river, lying in a bed of yellow daisies was a figure, the sun shining off his peachy skin, reflecting in his black hair. The huge hazel eyes opened, the light throwing it into a kaleidoscope of green, brown, gold and amber.
I put my foot into the warm water of the river. I was going to join him. I took off my shirt and dropped my pants, the fabric being swept away down the stream. If only that bird in the tree would stop chirping like that. As I swam naked towards the other end of the river, I realized it wasn’t a bird. It was an alarm and I was lying in my bed.
I gasped staring at my bedroom ceiling. At first I felt annoyed at being woken before the good stuff happened. Then I felt slightly in shock with myself. I’d had naughty dreams about girls when I was in high school. I wasn’t that creative, I mainly dreamt about motor boating Mila Kunis and Angelina Jolie. I’d never had a sex dream about a man before.
As I got ready for work, the shock turned to guilt. I couldn’t look anyone in the eye as I arrived at the bookshop that morning. Maybe they’d look at my face and just know what I’d dreamed about the night before. In the break-room I tore open a muesli bar as Scott made himself his morning coffee. We still had a little while until the store opened
“I can’t believe it Devin,” Scott said to me, shaking his head. “I had my first ever wet dream over Inky…”
“Why Inky?” I asked.
“Cause he’s an incubus,” Scott replied with a shrug. “I posted about him on my twitter, you should bloody know! How dare you not follow me Judas.”
“I don’t have any of the twits and grams and books and snaps, you know that,” I replied.
“You like your social media as antisocial as possible,” he said.
“You know it,” I replied and we both laughed. He stared into my shifty eyes and then grinned.
“You had an Inky dream too!” he said. “Holy shit I bet everyone who saw him yesterday did. The laundrette’s gonna be full to the brim, everyone needs to wash their dirty sheets…”
“Classy,” I said. Kelly walked through the door, dumping her bag in one of the lockers.
“Nearly broke my finger last night thinking about Inky,” she said with a giggle.
“Thanks I didn’t want to eat anyway,” I said, putting down my muesli bar. Scott took a seat, settling in to watch us argue. He said our banter was what brought him to work every day. He never bothered even engaging with Kelly and sometimes I wished I could do the same.
“Don’t be such a prude!” she said to me as she got an apple from her bag. “You all wanked off to him as well, don’t even lie.”
Scott wrinkled up his nose at her.
“I don’t normally go for like sissy looking guys y’know, but he like did something to me, I dunno. I’d destroy him oh my god, I’d give him the fuck of his life. Where do you think he lives? Next time he’s here I should follow him home…”
“Yeah I think that’s called stalking,” I said. Scott muffled a laugh.
“Good point, don’t want to share a cell with your Dad do I?” Kelly replied.
“You don’t have to worry about that, I’m not sure if you know this but they actually have separate prisons for men and women? Unless you have a very well-kept secret of course.”
“They’re not gonna arrest me for following a guy home, that’s insane Devin, God,” Kelly snapped at once. “Like maybe if I was a creep like you, yeah but I’m a girl so…”
“Hurray for double standards,” I said.
“Fuck off,” she said. “You’re just mad that I have the balls to ask someone out or at least take them into my car and fuck their brains out. You see a pretty girl you just hide in here like you always do. I mean when’s the last time you actually went on a date?”
“Oh yes, yes we’re all just burning with jealousy over you, Kelly,” I said trying to hide the fact that her remark had actually stung a bit.
“Ignore the question then,” Kelly said, looking rather pleased with herself. She didn’t often win our verbal spats. She quickly hurried from the room before I could possibly get another word in.
“Poor form, Devin,” said Scott. “I hope you’re not losing your touch, I’ll quit if you and Kelly stop having your fights. It’s like Tyrion versus Cersei.”
“C’mon you flatter me too much, I’m no way near as cool as Tyrion,” I said.
“But Kelly’s as bad as Cersei then?” said Scott. I just shrugged and Scott laughed.
Later on I didn’t really feel like having lunch in the staff breakroom so I went outside to eat. It was good to get a bit of exercise and fresh air as I hiked up the hill towards the park. Like I said, in the past ten years the area had begun to recover slightly. Around the river and waterfall was still pretty disgusting but the bushlands that led that way had cleared, grass and flowers slowly beginning to bloom again. The tourists were still afraid to return so it was always quiet. I found it a nice place to sit by myself.
As I sat down on the bench and opened my container of left-over ozzo bucco, I felt a tingle on the back of my neck. I could hear a soft voice gently singing out a song. Turning around I saw sitting cross-legged in a flowerbed the man from yesterday. A stray cat that would always hiss and claw if you came near it, was curled up in his lap and he was scratching it behind the ears. I boggled at him and he looked up. When he caught eyes with me, I felt myself flush and my heart flutter. His shoulders went up under his ears, his body stiffened and a look of fear crossed his face. He was scared of me.
I watched as he carefully put the cat down, who meowed unhappily at him. He walked as fast as he could in the direction of the waterfall, disappearing around a corner.
People started to see him every day. He’d be staring up at the mural in the carpark behind the main street, or sitting on a bench with the stray cat in his lap, or in the park admiring the flowers. I didn’t approach him, but many others tried. He’d always get up and scarper off the second he saw someone coming near. Every time he’d run in the direction of the waterfall.
About a week after we’d first spotted Inky, I went to the mailbox in the morning to find I’d gotten a letter from my Dad. I put it in my jacket pocket and forgot about it for the rest of the day.
I went to the bar that night. The bookstore staff often caught up for drinks Fridays and Saturdays. Ray and Kelly were making a ruckus in the front room. Ray was even more annoying than usual as Kelly giggled at his every word, perched on his knee.
“Why don’t we have the fuckin’ footy playin’ c’mon this is bullshit…!” he was yelling at the bartender.
“Go to the pub if you’re so mad, man…?” the bartender tried to say.
“No, no, don’t goddamn brush me off why can’t you have it here huh? This whole place with ya fruity fuckin’ drinks and entrees, fuckin’ hire me, I’ll put in a stripper pole, topless waitresses, run this place properly.”
He groped at Kelly’s tits.
“I already got my first employee right here!”
“Oh my god, I’m not being a stripper what the fuck!” Kelly laughed as she spilled her cocktail down her front. The bartender rolled his eyes, turning away from them to serve me. The one thing me and Kelly had in common that got me a lot of mockery was our taste in booze. I ordered a cosmopolitan as Ray sneered at me.
“Take me out back and shoot me if I ever drink one of them willingly,” he said as he took a swig of his pint of beer.
“Wow willingly that’s a big word for you isn’t it, three entire syllables!” I replied, taking my drink. Ray’s eyes flashed dangerously and he tried to rise out of his seat, obviously forgetting he still had Kelly in his lap. She shrieked, throwing her arms around his neck, spilling the rest of her drink down his back. Ray swore at the top of his lungs.
"That's it, you're out of here, the pair of youse…!” the bartender snapped as I slunk towards the smoking area. It was an ugly cement area next to the bins. I wasn’t a smoker but I preferred sitting back here. It was where I found the best conversation. There was a few people gathered around and I had a quick glance to see if there were any mates about. I spotted Morgan and Cress sitting on milk crates, having a smoke. I went to them, pulling over a keg to sit on.
“Drinking your fruit juice again?” Morgan said as I sat down.
“Oi this has a mad high alcohol content compared to your watered down wheat runoff,” I said.
“Is that a scientific term, mad high?” said Morgan.
“You know it,” I said. “Your alcohol content is classified as piss poor.”
Morgan laughed. I turned to Cress who was staring up at the night sky.
“You got Aunt Noelle all in a tizzy over her Esky store,” I said and Cress blinked slowly and then laughed.
“Sorry, I had a cheeky joint before I got here I don’t know up from down,” she said, shaking her head. “I been thinking about Inky.”
“Haven’t we all,” I said as Morgan shifted uncomfortably on the spot.
“God that was bizarre,” Morgan said. “I’ve been a dead set lesbo my whole life and Inky walks in and makes me question everything. How does someone fuck with everyone’s sexuality all at once? You notice Ray trying to act as hetero as possible out front? Poor fucker’s rattled as all hell just like all of us.”
Cress waved her hand around dismissively at this.
“Naw I wasn’t no rattlesnake,” said Cress. “See, when he walked past my storefront I got the nerves at first but then I saw everyone else got hit, realized it was just a love spell and it didn’t mean nothing y’know.”
“Scott reckons he’s an incubus,” I said and Cress snorted, rolling her eyes.
“Bullshit,” she said. “Scott don’t know nothing.”
I raised an eyebrow at her.
“Listen,” said Cress clicking her fingers. “I run the spiritual shop, I know my shit. Incubus? Nah man, nah way. He can’t be an incubus, he’s not done any seducin’, he goes and scrams the minute any of us see 'im. And the dreams don’t fit the description either. If a cubi can’t seduce you in the real world, they go into your dreams, screw you silly and leave you exhausted and drained of all your energy, they steal your bread batter and put buns in ovens. I asked around, no-one’s had any dreams where he took their bread batter or took ‘em to pound town. No takin’ bread batter, no puttin’ buns in oven, no seducin’. He ain’t no incubus. Unless he stole your batter, Devin?”
I muffled laughter as she took a puff from her cigarette to recover from her rant.
“Nah he didn’t steal my bread batter, Cress,” I said as Morgan bit back a smirk.
“Anyway,” said Morgan. “I thought the whole incubus and succubus myth was just people not understanding sleep paralysis.”
“Boo,” said Cress at once, elbowing her.
“Yeah fuck your rational scientific explanation,” I piped in.
Morgan put her hands up in defeat.
“Deepest apologies,” she said. “I’m gonna get another drink, youse want anything?”
I shook my head no as Cress got up as well.
The couple walked out of the smoking area leaving me alone. It was chilly out and I tucked my hands into my jacket pocket. There was a rustle and I realized I’d forgotten to read Dad’s letter. I took out the wrinkled papers. I blinked. There were about half a dozen grey-lead pencil drawings inside, along with a scrawled letter.
I went through the pictures, feeling cold fingers of unease tickling up my spine. The first drawing was of an alleyway and bins. There was a figure crouched down with a few cats around them, tickling one under the chin. He had familiar dark, soft looking hair and sweet innocent eyes. It was Inky.
The next picture was of Inky curled up naked in the grass. His face was contorted and black liquid was dribbling from his eyes, nose and mouth. The third picture was of the figure now dressed in a baggy plaid shirt and jeans, hugging his knees to his chest and burying his face away. The fourth was nearly the same except Inky was looking up, staring from the paper with tear-filled eyes. The fifth picture was the back of a car with four figures tied up together with burlap sacks over their heads squashed up beside each other.
The final picture was of a forest scene. There was a stake in the ground and a fat, middle-aged man was skewered on it, the stake impaling him through his anus, the pointed end sticking out of his mouth. Above him in the trees was another man, younger with a shaggy beard and hair. His abdomen was torn open and he was hanging from the branches by his intestines. A third man was lying in the soil, his hands chained to a tree trunk, his body smeared with a sticky looking substance. I couldn’t make out his features as his flesh were crawling with ants and flies that were eating him alive. I could see in the far distance, the familiar figure of Inky, looking over the scene with his mouth hanging open, his miserable face dripping with black liquid.
At the bottom of each drawing was my Dad’s scrawled signature.
“What’s that you’re reading?” said Morgan as she walked back outside. “Cress’s abandoned me to dance, you’re left with my wonderful company now.”
I didn’t answer and her cheerful look changed to confusion.
“You alright mate?” she said as she sat down beside her. I gave her the pictures with shaking hands. She looked over them one by one, the colour slowly draining from her face, her eyes boggling wider and wider until they looked the size of ping-pong balls.
“You’re dad drew these?” she whispered. I nodded, my whole body feeling numb. Her eyes flicked over to the letter I was still holding.
“What’s it say?” she said and I looked down at the messy scrawl. I offered it to her so we could both read. She frowned, shaking her head.
“Sorry,” she said. “I can’t make head or tails of that.”
I’d forgotten that most people couldn’t read my dad’s chicken scratch writing and bad spelling. I started to read it for her, my voice trembling.
“Dear Devin,” I said. “They’re letting me send you these cause it ain’t new information, I already told the cops all about this when I was arrested. They didn’t believe half of it but I swear it’s fucking true. I know about that man you were talking about. I never thought I’d hear about him again. I could barely believe it when you told me. Let me tell you everything.”
“In the 60s I worked as a handyman at a hotel in town. It was a fancy art hotel, had all these paintings on the wall. I was there to fix elevators and phones and TVs and all that shit.”
“Look I’ve been in jail for bloody decades surrounded by men twenty-four seven and I ain’t never been tempted to do anything with any of them. Never had a problem with blokes who swing that way either, it just ain’t for me. I always thought I was straight as an arrow but there was one exception what made me question meself. The fella what visited the hotel every time we changed the art on the walls who’d come down and admire it for hours, who I saw feeding the strays out in the alleyway. I was bloody besotted. Frightened me it did, didn’t know what the hell was happening to me.”
“Everyone in the hotel loved him too. He never booked a room for himself and didn’t speak a word so we didn’t know his name. Everyone called him Baby. I tended to just avoid Baby if he came into the hotel, didn’t want to confront these bloody feelings y’know it wasn’t like today, you could get arrested, put in the loony bin, your reputation ruined for liking blokes.”
"Now I knew one of the concierges was dodgy, we all did. He could get a guest anything they wanted for a bit of extra cash. I didn’t stick my nose in, cause I didn’t think it was too serious. He’d just get the drugs and hookers to the guests and all that. I started hearing rumours he was getting worse. Starting to send drugged up women to rooms, children for creeps. But he kept his tracks squeaky clean and there wasn’t any evidence he’d done a thing wrong. He looked like such a little harmless punk I didn’t believe he’d get into that really evil business. I just thought naw it’s gossip is all.”
“One day I was fixing the fridge in a room belonging to these three business men when I heard whispering. I didn’t know what it meant and was too focused to really pay it much attention. All I heard was “help us get him to our room and you can join in.”’
“I wished I’d paid proper attention, enough to fuckin’ stop them. But I didn’t. All hell broke loose that night. The concierge came back from his dinner break as cool as a cucumber and then five minutes later the hotel collapsed.”
“The marble staircase cracked right down the middle. All the paintings fell off the walls, all the windows and chandeliers shattered and the ceiling caved in. I was running for the front entrance when I saw this huge river of black oil flooding down the broken staircase. It was making this awful sound, like a widow at a funeral. I’d never heard something so heartbroken in my life. It crashed out onto the street and swept off and away. We were lucky to be in an off-season so no-one died, but quite a few were injured.”
“I followed the black stain all the way through town and up into the woods. That’s where I found Baby, curled up and naked. He was absolutely traumatized, wouldn’t speak a word to me, oozing black oil from his mouth. I stayed with him. Wouldn’t go near enough to touch him cause I’d figured out what the men had done and knew he wouldn’t want another bloke to lay a finger on him. But I gave him a new set of clothes, gave him food and drink, kept guard as he slept and said comforting things when he woke up from nightmares. I took care of him.”
“He didn’t get better. The nightmares got worse, he couldn’t keep food down. He was wasting away and the woods were just rotting to bits around him. The trees trunks were full of maggots and the ground was this stinking mud and all the fish in the river floated up dead to the surface. I felt furious at these fucking mongrels who done it to him. So then well, you know what I did to them don’t ya?”
“I was fucking nuts, I thought, look what I did for you, this will make you feel better. The look on Baby’s face. He was crying, turning away to vomit up the black oil. I tried to go to him and he cowered like a kicked dog. Terrified, he was terrified of me. Baby ran into the woods and I never saw him again. But I heard him crying that widow’s wail, echoing all through the forest. I wanted to die. I wanted to throw myself into the river and drown. I’d buried the concierge alive but he managed to dig himself out and run to the cops. I didn’t resist. I let them arrest me, convict me and put me away.”
“Funnily enough the concierge is in here with me now. Years after I was convicted, the law caught up with him. In here for a fuckload of fucked up shit. They keep us separated though, obviously scared I’m gonna try to kill him again. Little weaselly scumbag.”
“But I loved my Baby with all my heart and soul. I still do. I pray he’ll forgive me. But I know he never will. I can’t forgive myself either. The only good thing that’s come out of all of this is having you, Devin. If not for you I think I would have hung meself years ago. ”
“So that’s it I guess. I couldn’t tell you this all in a visit or a phone call, you understand. Had to write it down. Love ya kiddo. From your psycho bastard Dad.”
I put the letter down and Morgan and I just stared at each other. The other people in the smoking area seemed far away, the world just focused in on just me, Morgan and the letter in my hands.
“But he’s back,” I said in a croaky voice. “Dad said it was the 60s? Baby, Inky whatever it is, still looks like he’s in his mid to late twenties? How’s that possible?”
“Obviously he’s not human,” Morgan muttered back, looking completely dazed. “I don’t know what the hell he is.”
We became aware of a lot of excited whispering among the smoker’s area. People were getting up to run off into the front room. Morgan and I exchanged looks and got up to follow the crowd. Groups of people were gathered around the windows and front door, peering out into the street.
“What’s happening?” I asked Cress, who was spinning a pen on the countertop.
“Inky sighting,” she replied with a shrug. I saw across the road, the slender shape wandering down the pavement, looking around himself with his usual slightly sleepy expression. A big sigh went through the people in the building, people smiling sappily, their clasped hands beneath the chins.
“Such an angel…” someone said.
We all watched as he turned the corner. He was heading for the mural in the carpark again. When he was out of eyesight, the admiring onlookers dispersed, going back to the bar or trickling into the smoker’s area again. Morgan and I hovered by the door. In the distance, I could hear a faint yelling.
“I saw him, I saw that little fairy, he was just here a second ago!” Ray’s voice rang out down the road. “I just wanna talk to him, I just wanna fuckin’ talk!”
Kelly, laughing with a bottle in one hand and her shoes in the other was staggering a few paces behind him.
“You’re crazy!” she kept saying, zigzagging down the pavement. “You’re crazy Ray!”
They went around the corner in the direction of the carpark.
“Cress we gotta go,” Morgan said at once.
“Why what’s going on?” Cress replied, looking up from her pen spinning.
“You explain,” I said to Morgan, shoving the letter and drawings into her hand. “I’ll go.”
I raced down into the cold, dark street, my breath heavy, my heart in my chest. I remembered the pictures of Inky curled up naked, crying with oil spilling down his face. The back seat full of the tied up, hooded men. I imagined the scream as the downfall of black oil exploded over the white marble of the hotel staircase.
The mural was lit by a golden streetlight, taking up an entire wall, depicting the waterfall back before it had been polluted. It had bright, glittering blue water, surrounded by a rainbow of flowers and wild deer pranced through the emerald green of the riverbank.
Inky had his fingertips just grazing the painting as he slowly looked it over. His face was slightly furrowed as he stroked the painted brick.
“Fuckin’ poof!” yelled Ray, staggering across the carpark. “I bet ya wanna fuckin’ suck me off don’t ya you little fuckin’…”
Then he fell over sideways into the bushes, crumpling to the ground. He struggled to get to his feet, swearing and thrashing about like an upended turtle. Then he just gave up, curling up in the fetal position in the bushes, sticking his thumb in his mouth. In five seconds he was fast asleep and snoring.
Kelly had completely forgotten about Ray as she swayed over towards Inky.
“I’m just gonna smack his arse is all,” Kelly slurred into her drink. “I wanna grab it so bad. Maybe grab his dick too. Look he’s a skinny little thing, not like he’s gonna push me off, is he? And look he’s a man, all men want it. I’m gonna make Inky’s goddamn night.”
I barged towards her, getting in her way and she instantly pushed my chest trying to get around me.
“For fuck’s sake,” I said. “Kelly have you lost your mind? Jesus.”
I grabbed her by the shoulder and for a second a dark urge stirred in my chest. I wanted to grab her by the hair and smash her stupid face into the brick wall. Smash it until the brains leaked out. Grab the bottle and break it over her head.
“Get off me, just chill, just fuckin’ chill,” she said, fighting against my grip. “You’re insane! Let me go!”
I could do it. I could pull out a chunk of her hair, gouge my fingers into her eyes until they bled, stab my keys into her ear and rupture the eardrum. I could feel my breath heavy in my chest and Kelly looked into my eyes. She stopped struggling and just went still. The bottle smashed to the ground beneath us. I saw the terror in her face, heard the tiny whimper in her throat.
There was a sound behind me. It was a low, long and agonized moan of utter misery and fear.
My hand dangled down by my side.
“Just go home alright,” I managed to say. “Just sleep it off.”
Kelly nodded, tears streaming down her face. Over at the bushes, Morgan and Cress were helping Ray to his feet as he muttered about how he wanted to be the meat in their lesbian sandwich.
“Alrighty girlie,” Cress called to Kelly. “You come with us now, we walk ya drunk mess home.”
Sending a fearful look over her shoulder at me, Kelly nearly ran towards them. Morgan sent me a stiff nod as the four of them started heading down the street together, leaving me behind. Feeling like I was underwater in an ice cold pool, I slowly turned around.
The creature was standing stock still in the middle of the carpark. His hands were shaking and his eyes were filled with black liquid. I could see an oily black trail seeping from the corner of his mouth down his chin. But he wasn’t wailing anymore.
I felt the shame twist my insides. I’d helped to terrify him into that state. My skin felt cold and I was trembling all over. Would I have really done it? If I hadn’t had heard the crying, what would I have done to Kelly?
I brushed my own tears from my eyes and turned to puke up into the nearest bush. The acid burned my throat, my body cramped and my stomach heaved as I retched endlessly. It seemed like hours had passed when I’d manage to throw everything up. I wiped my mouth on the back on my hand and staggered to my feet again. Turning around to look behind me, I saw the creature had gone.
Kelly called in sick for the next few days. No-one saw Inky either. He’d gone back into hiding it seemed. Finally around Thursday, while I was eating breakfast in the break-room, Kelly slunk through the door. I watched her out of the corner of my eye as she silently put her bag away.
“Hey,” Kelly murmured. “Thanks for the other night. I nearly did something really stupid.”
“Yeah you did,” I responded at once. I knew she was trying to extend an olive branch to me but being sarcastic to her was just second nature. Kelly cast her eyes down and didn’t answer. Then she silently nodded in agreement and hurried out of the break-room again. I went back to my bowl of muesli.
“Look Devin,” Scott said when he came in, showing me his phone. “Apparently the waterfall is cleaner then it’s been since the oil spill. Everyone’s in goddamn shock, it’s mending so fast out of absolutely nowhere.”
He smiled, shaking his head.
“And all the wild deer have come back too.”
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2020.05.08 19:47 IWishIWasBatman123 IJW: Black Swan (2010)

Full transparency: I initially watched this film for two reasons. First, I loved and still love Requiem for a Dream, as well as psychological thrillers in general. Second, I think that Natalie Portman and Mila Kunis are two of the hottest women alive and I knew about the (slight spoilers here) lesbian scene between the two... and as a single 21 year old male there's no way I'm passing that up.
The lesbian scene is pretty hot, but honestly, this whole film is an absolute masterclass. I don't know much about how movies are filmed, different types of shots and editing, but I'm still positive that this whole thing is both edited and filmed perfectly. As for the story and characters, they are engrossing and leap off the screen. Every major character in this project is acted and written beautifully, and as an anxiety-riddled perfectionist who has fun when he is convinced to let loose but doesn't often let loose, I was in this thing for the whole ride and couldn't stop watching. I have ADD, and so sometimes it's difficult for me to pay attention to movies for their whole length. Often, I will stop films at certain points and take brief intermissions. This allows me to act on whatever distractions have piled up so I can focus on the movie again, without spending a film messing around on Twitter and missing important plot points. I kept my breaks as short as possible with this one, aching to get back into it as soon as I could.
This movie is amazing; everything about it is incredible. It expertly melds drama, horror, and thriller together for one hell of an intoxicating, well, roll.
Scores an S ranking, or 5/5, from me.
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2020.04.24 18:03 andreabartz I’m Andrea Bartz, the author of the thrillers THE HERD and THE LOST NIGHT. AMA!

Hi, Reddit! I'm Andrea Bartz, the author of THE HERD, a thriller published last month by Ballantine. It's about an elite all-female coworking space that's rocked by the mysterious disappearance of its enigmatic founder, and her two best friends, who'll risk their friendships, their careers, and maybe even their lives to uncover the haunting truth. It delves deep into consumerist feminist, the complexity of female friendships, and society's sky-high standards for high-achieving women—and what happens when their perfect veneers begin to crack. My debut thriller, THE LOST NIGHT, came out in 2019 and is being developed for TV by Mila Kunis. I'm here to answer your questions about the novels, my writing process, or anything else you'd like to know, so AMA!
You can learn more about my books and see upcoming virtual events here: http://AndreaBartz.com
Follow me on Twitter here: http://twitter.com/andibartz
Follow me on Instagram here: http://instagram.com/andibartz
Follow my Facebook page here: https://www.facebook.com/andreabartzautho
Proof: https://www.instagram.com/p/B-dGCepgdU
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2020.02.18 01:12 jonisantucho Oscars 2021: An inside look (like, really inside) to 50 possible contenders in the next awards race

Another Oscar ceremony happened, and we got our fair share of joy and disappointment. After Parasite surprised the world and took Best Picture, it seems like the game has changed for the awards race, now that non-English speaking films can actually fight and be recognized as well as classics as… Green Book. The Oscar race is still full of pain and glory, and even though the year has barely started, we have a bunch of movies that are fighting for air. And here’s 50 of them. Yes, I had some free time in my hands and this is a cool hobby, so I took the liberty to introduce most of the movies that will have Film Twitter entertained for the following 12 months. I say most, because there are always contenders who come out of nowhere later in the year, so this is the starter set. Here we go.
-Annette: Since Parasite’s road to the Oscars started at Cannes, it seems fair to talk about a movie that is circling a premiere in the world stage that is set in France. After delivering weird, indie classics like Mauvais Sang and Holy Motors (yes, the kind of movies that make you seem like a snob when you recommend them to people), Leos Carax is making his first movie spoken in the English language… and it has a musical screenplay written by the cult rock duo of Sparks. Recently robbed Adam Driver and previous Oscar winner Marion Cotillard sing in this tale of a stand-up comedian and a famous soprano singer who rise and fall in Los Angeles while their daughter is born with a special gift. It seems like a wild bet, but we already know that Carax is a master with musical moments, so this is one of the most intriguing question marks of the year.
-Ammonite: It’s time to talk narratives. On the one hand, we have Kate Winslet, a known name who hasn’t been very successful in the Oscar race since her Oscar win for The Reader over a decade ago (with the exception being her supporting performance in Steve Jobs, where she had a weird accent). On the other, we have Saoirse Ronan, a star on the rise who keeps collecting Oscar nominations, with 4 nods at the age of 25, including her fresh Best Actress loss for Little Women. What happens if we put them together in a drama set in the coasts of England during the 19th century where both of them fall for each other? That’s gonna be a winning formula if writedirector Francis Lee (who tackled queer romance in his acclaimed debut God’s Own Country) nails the Mary Anning story, and Neon (the distribution company founded three years ago that took Parasite to victory) is betting on it.
-Benedetta: We know the Paul Verhoeven story. After isolating himself from Hollywood for over a decade, he took Isabelle Huppert to an Oscar nominated performance with the controversial, sexy, dark and funny thriller Elle. Now, he’s back with another story that perks up the ears, because now he’s covering the life of Benedetta Carlini, a 17th-century lesbian nun who had religious and erotic visions. If you know Paul, you already can tell that this fits into his brand of horniness, and a possible Cannes premiere could tell us if this has something to carry itself to Oscar night.
-Blonde: With a short but impactful directorial credits list that takes us from Chopper, to The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford to Killing Them Softly, Andrew Dominik is back with a film about Marilyn Monroe, a woman who has transcended the ideas of fame and stardom, in ways that are glamorous and nightmarish at the same time. After failing to launch with Naomi Watts or Jessica Chastain,the rising Ana de Armas takes the lead in the retelling of Monroe’s troubled life based on Joyce Carol Oates’ novel, which is said to be covered in the screenplay as somewhat of a horror movie. We don’t know what that means yet, but Netflix is gonna push hard for this one, especially considering how the Academy loves throwing awards to stars playing previous stars, and that also can possibly include co-stars Bobby Cannavale and Adrien Brody.
-Breaking News in Yuba County: While he hasn’t gone back to the heights of his success achieved by the box office and award success of The Help (a movie that did not age well), Tate Taylor is still enjoying himself economically due to recent thrillers like The Girl on the Train and Ma. For his next movie, he’s made a dramedy that once again reunites him with Oscar winner Allison Janney, where she plays a woman who has to keep appearances and a hidden body when she catches her husband cheating on her, and then he dies of a heart attack. With a cast that also includes Mila Kunis, Regina Hall, Awkwafina, Samira Wiley, Wanda Sykes, Jimmi Simpson and Ellen Barkin, this could be a buzzy title later this year.
-C’mon C’mon: You may love or hate whatever Joaquin Phoenix did in Joker, but you can’t deny the benefit of playing the Crown Prince of Crime in an Oscar-winning performance. The blank check that you share with indie directors afterwards. Now that Joaquin’s cultural cachet is on the rise, Mike Mills gets to benefit with this drama that stars Phoenix and Gaby Hoffmann, with him playing an artist left to take care of his precocious young nephew as they forge an unexpected bond over a cross country trip. We only have to wonder if A24 will do better with this movie’s Oscar chances compared to 20th Century Women.
-Cherry: After killing half the universe and bringing them back with the highest grossing movie of all time, where do you go? For Joe and Anthony Russo, the answer is “away from the Marvel Cinematic Universe”. The Russo brothers are trying to distance themselves and prove that they have a voice without Kevin Feige behind them, with a crime drama that’s also different than their days when they directed You, Me and Dupree or episodes of Arrested Development and Community. To help them in the journey, they took Tom Holland (who also needs to distance himself from Spider-Man, lest he ends up stuck to the character in the audience’s eyes) to star in a crime drama based on former Army medic Nico Walker’s memoir about his days after Iraq, where the PTSD and an opioid addiction led him to start robbing banks.
-Da 5 Bloods: After bouncing back from a slump with the critical and commercial success of BlackKklansman, Spike Lee is cashing a Netflix check to tell the tale of four African American veterans who return to Vietnam to search for their fallen leader and some treasure. With a cast that includes Delroy Lindo, Clarke Peters, Isiah Whitlock Jr, Paul Walter Hauser and Chadwick Boseman, this sounds like an interesting combo, although we still should remember the last time that Spike tried his hand at a war movie, with the dull Miracle at St. Anna.
-Dune: If you are on Reddit, you probably know about the new film by movies’ new Messiah, Denis Villeneuve. While the epic sci-fi novel by Frank Herbert is getting a new chance in the multiplexes after that David Lynch movie that was forgotten by many, some are hoping that this will be the beginning of a new franchise (as seen by the release date of December 18, taking the spot of the usual Star Wars opening), and a return to the whole “remember when stuff like Return of the King or Fury Road were nominated for Best Picture?” question. Timothee Chalamet will be riding a lot of hope, and sandworm.
-Everybody’s Talking About Jamie: As you start to see, there are several musicals that are gonna be fighting for attention over the next year, and Annette was the first one. Now, we also have this adaptation of the hit West End production, that centers around a gay British teenager who dreams of becoming a drag queen and get his family and schoolmates to accept his sexuality. With a cast that mixes young unknowns, familiar Brits (Sharon Horgan, Sarah Lancashire and my boy Ralph Ineson) and the previously nominated legend that is Richard E. Grant (who is playing a former drag queen named Loco Chanelle), the creative team of the stage musical will jump to the big screen with the help of Fox Searchlight (sorry, just Searchlight), who has clear Oscar hopes with a release date right in the middle of awards heat, on October 23.
-Hillbilly Elegy: Even though the Parasite victory gave many people hope for a new Academy that stops recognizing stuff like previous winner Green Book… let’s be honest, the Academy will still look for movies like Green Book. This year, many people are turning their eyes towards Ron Howard’ adaptation of J.D. Vance’s memoir about his low income life in a poor rural community in Ohio, filled with drugs, violence and verbal abuse. If this sounds like white trash porn, it doesn’t help to know that Glenn Close, who has become the biggest living Oscar bridesmaid with seven nominations, will play a character called Mamaw. And if that sounds trashy, then you have to know that Amy Adams, who follows Glenn with six nominations, is playing her drug-addicted, careless daughter. I don’t want to call this “Oscar bait”, but it sure is tempting.
-I’m Thinking of Ending Things: After his stopmotion existential dramedy Anomalisa got him a Best Animated Feature nomination at the Oscars but at the same time bombed at the box office, Charlie Kaufman is getting the Netflix check. This time, he’s adapting the dark novel by Iain Reid, about a woman (Jessie Buckley, who is on the rise and took over the role after Brie Larson had to pass) who is taken by her boyfriend (Jesse Plemons) to meet his parents (Toni Collette and David Thewlis), in a trip that takes a turn for the worse. If Kaufman can deliver with this one, it will be a big contender.
-In the Heights: Yes, more musicals! This time, it’s time to talk about Lin-Manuel Miranda’s first Tony-winning musical, that was overshadowed because of his other small play about some treasury secretary. Now, his Broadway ensemble tale about life in a neighborhood in Washington Heights is jumping to the movie screen with Jon Chu at the helm, following the success of Crazy Rich Asians. This Latino tale mixes up-and-comers like Anthony Ramos (who comes straight from Hamilton and playing Lady Gaga’s friend in A Star is Born), names like Corey Hawkins and Jimmy Smits (who is pro bits), and Olga Merediz, who starred in the Broadway show as Abuela Claudia and who could be the early frontrunner for Best Supporting Actress, if Chu allows her to shine like she did onstage.
-Jesus Was My Homeboy: When looking at up-and-coming Black actors right now in Hollywood, two of the top names are Daniel Kaluuya and Lakeith Stanfield, who already appeared in the same movie in Get Out, which earned Kaluuya a Best Actor nomination. This time, they share the screen in Shaka King’s retelling of the story of Fred Hampton (Kaluuya), an activist and Black Panther leader… as well as the story of William O’Neal (Stanfield), the FBI agent sent by J. Edgar Hoover to infiltrate the party and arrest him. With the backing of Warner Bros, this will attempt to make an impact with a clash of actors that will have to fight with an August release date, not the ideal time to release an awards movie.
-King Richard: Starting with Suicide Squad, Will Smith has been trying to prove that he’s back and better than ever. Some attempts to get back to the top of the A-list (Aladdin, Bad Boys For Life) have worked, while others (Gemini Man, Spies in Disguise)... have not. But Will is still going, and now he’s going for his next prestige play as he plays Richard Williams, the coach and father of the tennis legends Venus and Serena, who pushed them to their full potential. While it’s weird that the father of the Williams sisters is getting a movie before them, it does sound like a meaty role for Smith, who has experience with Oscar notices with sports biopics because of what he did with Michael Mann in Ali. Let’s hope director Reinaldo Marcus Green can take him there too.
-Last Night in Soho: Every year, one or two directors who have a cool reputation end up in the Dolby Theatre, and 2020 could be the year of Edgar Wright. After delivering his first big box office hit with Baby Driver, the Brit is going back to London to tell a story in the realm of psychological horror, which has been supposedly inspired by classics like Don’t Look Now and Repulsion. With a premise that supposedly involves time travel and a cast that includes Anya-Taylor Joy, Thomasin McKenzie, Matt Smith and Diana Rigg, Wright (who also co-wrote this with Krysty Wilson-Cairns, who was just nominated for Best Original Screenplay for her work in 1917) is making a big swing.
-Let Them All Talk: Every year there’s more new streaming services, and that also means that there’s new players in the Oscar game. To secure subscribers to the new service, HBO Max has secured the rights to the next Steven Soderbergh movie, a comedy that stars Meryl Streep as a celebrated author that takes her friends (Candice Bergen, Dianne Wiest) and her nephew (Lucas Hedges, again) in a journey to find fun and come to terms with the past. The last time that Soderbergh and Streep worked together, the end result was the very disappointing The Laundromat. Let’s hope that this time everything works out.
-Ma Rainey’s Black Bottom: Now that Netflix got the deal to adapt August Wilson’s acclaimed plays with Denzel Washington’s production company, the next jump from the stage to the screen is a meaty one. Viola Davis is playing blues singer Ma Rainey in this tale of a heated recording session with her bandmates, her agent and her producer in 1927, with a cast that also includes Chadwick Boseman, Glynn Turman and Colman Domingo. The Tony nominated play talked about race, art and the intersection of the two, and it’s gonna be explosive to see that unfold on screen, even if director George C. Wolfe’s previous filmography isn’t very encouraging.
-Macbeth: In a shocking development, the Coen brothers are no more. Well, just this time. For the first time in his career, Joel Coen is making a movie without Ethan, and it’s a Shakespeare adaptation. Denzel Washington is playing the man who wants to be king of Scotland, and Frances McDormand is playing his Lady Macbeth. While this just started filming and it will be a race to finish it in time for competition in the awards race, the potential is there, and this project has everybody’s attention.
-Mank: After scoring 24 Oscar nominations and only winning 2 awards last Sunday, Netflix has to wonder what else must they do to get in the club that awards them. They tried with Cuarón, they tried with Scorsese, they tried with Baumbach, they tried with two Popes, and they still feel a barrier. Now, the big gamble for awards by the streamer in 2020 comes to us in the hands of David Fincher, who is basically their friend after the rest of Hollywood denied him (Disney dropped his 20,000 Leagues adaptation, HBO denied the US remake of Utopia, and Paramount drove World War Z 2 away from him). In his first movie since 2014’s Gone Girl, David will go black and white to tackle a script by his late father about the making of the classic of classics, Citizen Kane, with previous Oscar winner Gary Oldman playing the lead role of screenwriter Herman J. Mankiewicz. Will the Academy fall for the ultimate “power of da moviesshhh” story?
-Minari: Sundance can be hit or miss with the breakout films that try to make it to the Oscars. However, you can’t deny the waves made by A24 when they premiered Lee Isaac Chung’s new drama there, ending up winning the Grand Jury Prize and the Audience Award in the US Dramatic Competition. If Parasite endeared Academy voters to Korean families, Steven Yeun hopes that the same thing happens with this story, where he plays a father in the ‘80s who suddenly decides to move his family to Arkansas to start a farm. Even though the reviews have been great, we must also remember that last year, A24 had in their hands The Farewell, another Sundance hit about an Asian family that ended up with no Oscar nominations. Let’s hope that this time, the Plan B influence (remember, that’s Brad Pitt’s production company, of Moonlight and 12 Years a Slave fame) makes a difference.
-Next Goal Wins: It’s a good time to be Taika Waititi. Why? Taika Waititi can do what he wants. He can direct a Thor movie, he can win an Oscar for writing a comedy set in WW2 about a Third Reich boy who has an Imaginary Hitler friend, or he can pop up in The Mandalorian as a droid. Taika keeps winning, and he wants more. Between his press tour for Jojo Rabbit and his return to the MCU, he quickly shot an adaptation of a great documentary about the disgraced national team of American Samoa, one of the worst football teams known to man, as they try to make the cut for the 2014 FIFA World Cup. Everybody loves a good sports comedy, and Searchlight bets that we’ll enjoy this story led by Michael Fassbender as the new (and Dutch-American) coach in town who tries to shape the team for victory.
-News of the World: Seven years after their solid collaboration in Captain Phillips, Paul Greengrass and Tom Hanks reunite for more awards love in what seems to be Universal’s main attraction for the Oscars. This time, Hanks stars in a Western drama based on Paulette Jiles’ novel where he plays a traveling newsreader in the aftermath of the American Civil War who is tasked with reuniting an orphaned girl with her living relatives. With a Christmas release date, Universal is betting big in getting the same nomination boost that 1917 is enjoying right now, and the formula is promising.
-Nightmare Alley: Following his Best Picture and Best Director wins for The Shape of Water, everybody in Hollywood wondered what would Guillermo del Toro do next. Well, as Del Toro often does, a little bit of everything and nothing. Some projects moved (as his produced Pinocchio movie on Netflix, or his Death Stranding likeness cameo), others stalled and die (like his proposed Fantastic Voyage remake). But now he’s rolling on his next project, a new adaptation of the William Lindsay Gresham novel that already was a Tyrone Power film in 1947. This noir tale tells the story of a con man (Bradley Cooper) who teams up with a psychiatrist (Cate Blanchett) to trick people and win money, and how things get out of control. With a cast that also includes Toni Collette, Willem Dafoe, Rooney Mara and more, this could play well if it hits the right tone.
-Nomadland: There’s breakout years, and then there’s the amazing potential of Chloe Zhao’s 2020. On the one hand, after making Hollywood notice her skill with the gripping story of The Rider, she got the keys to the MCU kingdom to direct the next potential franchise of Kevin Feige, The Eternals. And just in case, she also has in her sleeve this indie drama that she wrote and directed beforehand, with two-time Oscar winner Frances McDormand playing a woman who, after losing everything in the Great Recession, embarks on a journey through the American West, living as a van-dwelling modern-day nomad. If Chloe nails these two films, it could be the one-two punch of the decade.
-One Night in Miami: Regina King is living her best life. Following her Oscar win for Best Supporting Actress in If Beale Street Could Talk and the success that came with her lead role in the Watchmen show on HBO, the actress is jumping to a new challenge: directing movies. For her big screen debut, she’s adapting Kemp Powers’ play that dramatizes a real meeting on February 25, 1964, between Muhammad Ali, Malcolm X, Sam Cooke and Jim Brown.
-Over the Moon: After earning praise and Oscar nominations with I Lost My Body and Klaus, Netflix will keep its bet on animated movies with a film directed by the legendary Glen Keane. Who? A classic Disney animator responsible for the design of characters like Ariel, the Beast, Aladdin, Pocahontas, Tarzan and more](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2jRkx2PNVr8), and who recently won an Oscar for Best Animated Short for Dear Basketball, which he co-directed with the late Kobe Bryant. Now, he brings us a musical adventure centered around a Chinese girl who builds a rocket ship and blasts off to the Moon in hopes of meeting a legendary Moon Goddess.
-Passing: It’s always interesting when an actor jumps behind the camera, and Rebecca Hall’s case is no exception. For her directorial debut, Hall chose to adapt Nella Larsen’s acclaimed novel set in Harlem in the 1920s, about two mixed race childhood friends (Ruth Negga and Tessa Thompson) who reunite in adulthood and become obsessed with one another's lives. With a premise that explores tough questions about race and sexuality, it looks like a tricky challenge for a first timer, but it would be more impressive if Hall manages to rise over the challenge.
-Prisoner 760: An interesting part of following the awards circuit is looking at when it's appropriate to talk about touchy subjects in recent history. I’m saying that because this next movie tells the real life tale of Mohamedou Ould Slahi (Tahar Rahim), a man who, despite not being charged or having a set trial, is held in custody at Guantanamo Bay, and turns towards a pair of lawyers (Jodie Foster and Shailene Woodley) to aid him. Based on the famous journal that the man wrote while he was being detained, the movie (that also counts with Benedict Cumberbatch) is directed by Kevin Macdonald who, a long time ago, helped Forest Whitaker win Best Actor for The Last King of Scotland. Could he get back in the race after almost 15 years of movies like State of Play?
-Raya and the Last Dragon: This year, Walt Disney Animation Studios’ bet for the Oscars is a fantasy tale set in a mysterious realm called Kumandra, where a warrior named Raya searches for the last dragon in the world. And that dragon has the voice of Awkwafina. Even though they missed out last Oscars when Frozen II got the cold shoulder by the Academy in Best Animated Feature, this premise looks interesting enough to merit a chance. One more thing: between last year’s Abominable, Over the Moon and this movie, there’s a clear connection of animated movies trying to appeal to Chinese sensibilities (and that sweet box office).
-Rebecca: It’s wild to think that the only time that Alfred Hitchcock made a film that won the Oscar for Best Picture was with 1940’s adaptation of Daphne du Maurier’s psychological thriller novel, more muted and conventional than his more known classics. Now, Ben Wheatley and Netflix are giving the Gothic story a new spin, with Lily James playing the newly married young woman who finds herself battling the shadow of her husband's (Armie Hammer) dead first wife, the mysterious Rebecca. The story is a classic, and we have to see how much weird Wheatley stuff is in the mix.
-Red, White and Water: Between 2011 and 2014, Jennifer Lawrence was everywhere and people loved it. She was America’s sweetheart, the Oscar winner, Katniss Everdeen. But then, everything kinda fell. Those X-Men movies got worse and she looked tired of being in them, her anecdotes got less charming and more pandering to some, she took respectable risks that didn’t pay off with Red Sparrow and Mother!, and some people didn’t like that she said that it wasn’t nice to share private photos of her online. Now, she looks to get back to the Oscar race with a small project funded by A24 and directed by Lila Neugebauer in her film debut, about a soldier who comes back to the US after suffering a traumatic brain injury in Afghanistan. Also, Brian Tyree Henry is in this, and it would be amazing if he got nominated for something.
-Respect: You know what’s a surefire way to get Academy voters’ attention? Play a real singer! Rami Malek took a win last year for playing Freddie Mercury, Renee Zellweger just won the gold after portraying Judy Garland, and now Jennifer Hudson wants more Oscar love. Almost 15 years after taking Best Supporting Actress for her role in Dreamgirls, Hudson will try to get more by playing soul legend Aretha Franklin, in a biopic directed by first timer Liesl Tommy that practically screams “give me the gold”. How am I so sure? Well, see the teaser that they released in December (for a movie that opens in October), and tell me. It will work out better for Hudson than Cats, that’s for sure.
-Soul: Unless they really disappoint (I’m looking at you, The Good Dinosaur, Cars 2 and Cars 3), you can’t have the Oscars without inviting Pixar to the party. This year, they have two projects in the hopes of success. While in a few weeks we’ll see what happens with the fantasy family road trip of Onward, the studio’s biggest bet of the year clearly is the next existential animation written and directed by Pete Docter, who brought Oscar gold to his home with Up and Inside Out. The movie, which centers on a teacher (voice of Jamie Foxx) who dreams of becoming a jazz musician and, just as he’s about to get his big break, ends up getting into an accident that separates his soul from his body, had a promising first trailer, and it also promises a score by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross, as well as new songs by Jon Batiste. The only downside so far for the marketing was the fact that the trailer reveal led people to notice a suspicious trend involving black characters when they lead an animated movie.
-Tenet: When Leonardo DiCaprio finally touched his Academy Award, an alarm went off in the mind of a portion of Internet users, who have made their next crusade to give themselves to the cause of getting Christopher Nolan some Oscar love. And his next blank check, an action thriller involving espionage and time travel, could pull off the same intersection of popcorn and prestige that made Inception both a box office hit and a critically acclaimed Oscar nominee. It helps to have a cast of impressive names like John David Washington, Elizabeth Debicki and Robert Pattinson, as well as a crew that includes Ludwig Goransson and Hoyte van Hoytema. In other words, if this becomes a hit, this could go for a huge number of nominations.
-The Devil All the Time: As you may have noticed by now, Netflix is leading the charge in possible Oscar projects. Another buzzy movie that comes from them is the new psychological thriller by Antonio Campos, a filmmaker known for delivering small and intimate but yet intense and terrifying dramas like Simon Killer and Christine. Using the novel by Donald Ray Pollock, Campos will follow non-linearly a cast of characters in Ohio between the end of World War II and the beginning of the Vietnam War, with the help of an interesting cast that includes Tom Holland, Sebastian Stan, Robert Pattinson, Mia Wasikowska, Eliza Scanlen, Bill Skarsgard, Jason Clarke and Riley Keough.
-The Eyes of Tammy Faye: After being known as a sketch comedy goofball because of The State, Wet Hot American Summer and Stella, Michael Showalter reinvented himself as a director of small and human dramedies like Hello, My Name is Doris and The Big Sick. For his next project, he’s gonna mix a little bit of both worlds, because he has before him the story of the televangelists Tammy Faye Bakker (Jessica Chastain, who has been really trying to recapture her early ‘10 awards run to no avail) and Jim Bakker (Andrew Garfield, who was previously nominated for Hacksaw Ridge, instead of Silence, because why). With a real life tale that involves Christian theme parks, fraud and conspiracies, this is the kind of loud small movie that Searchlight loves to parade around, especially as an actors showcase (Jojo Rabbit being the most recent example). The first image looks terrifying, by the way.
-The Father: It’s weird to be in the middle of February and say that there’s already a frontrunner for the Best Actor race at the next Oscars. After its premiere in Sundance a couple of weeks ago, every prognosticator pointed in the direction of Anthony Hopkins (recently nominated for Best Supporting Actor in The Two Popes), who delivers a harrowing portrayal of an old man grappling with his age as he develops dementia, causing pain to his beleaguered daughter (recent winner Olivia Colman, who also got praised). With reviews calling it a British answer to Amour (in other words: it’s a hard watch), Florian Zeller’s adaptation of his acclaimed play not only benefits from having Hopkins and Colman together as a selling point, because it was acquired by Sony Pictures Classics, a distributor with experience in getting Academy voters to watch adult movies with heavy themes. If you don’t believe me, watch how they got Julianne Moore a win for Still Alice, as well as recent nominations for Isabelle Huppert for Elle, Glenn Close for The Wife, and Antonio Banderas for Pain and Glory. They know the game, and they are going to hit hard for Hopkins and Colman.
-The French Dispatch: If you saw the trailer, we don’t need to dwell too much on the reasons. On the one hand, we have the style of Wes Anderson, a filmmaker who has become a name in both the critics circle and the casual viewer, with his last two movies (The Grand Budapest Hotel and Isle of Dogs) earning several Oscar nominations, including Best Picture for the one with Gustave H. Then, we have a long cast that goes from the director’s regulars like Bill Murray to new stars like Timothee Chalamet, and also includes people like Benicio del Toro. The only thing that could endanger the Oscar chances for this is that the story, an anthology set around a period comedy with an European riff on The New Yorker, will alienate the average Academy member.
-The Humans: There’s the prestige of a play, and then there’s the prestige of a Tony-winning play. Playwright Stephen Karam now gets to jump to the director’s chair to take his acclaimed 2016 one-act story to the big screen, and A24 is cutting the check. Telling the story of a family that gets together on Thanksgiving to commiserate about life, this adaptation will be led by original performer Jayne Houdyshell (who also won a Tony for her stage performance), who’ll be surrounded by Richard Jenkins, Beanie Feldstein, Amy Schumer, Steven Yeun and June Squibb. If it avoids getting too claustrophobic or stagey for the cinema, it will be a good contender.
-The Last Duel: Always speedy, Ridley Scott is working on his next possible trip to the Oscars. This time, it’s the telling of a true story in 14th-century France, where a knight (Matt Damon) accuses his former friend (Adam Driver) of raping his wife (Jodie Comer), with the verdict being determined by the titular duel. It’s a juicy story, but there was some concern when it seemed that the script was only being written by Damon and Ben Affleck (who’ll also appear in the film). A rape story written by them after the Weinstein revelations… not the best look. But then, it was revealed that they were writing the screenplay with indie figure Nicole Holofcener, who last year was nominated for an Oscar for her script for Can You Ever Forgive Me? Let’s hope that the story is told in a gripping but not exploitative way, and that it doesn’t reduce the role of Comer (who deserves more than some of the movie roles that she’s getting after Killing Eve) to a Hollywood stereotype.
-The Power of the Dog: We have to talk about the queen of the indie world, we have to talk about Jane Campion. More than a decade after her last movie, Bright Star, the Oscar and Palme d’Or winner for The Piano returns with a non-TV project (see Top of the Lake, people) thanks to Netflix, with a period drama centered around a family dispute between a pair of wealthy brothers in Montana, Phil (Benedict Cumberbatch) and George Burbank (Jesse Plemons), after the latter one marries a local widow (Kirsten Dunst). According to the synopsis, “a shocked and angry Phil wages a sadistic, relentless war to destroy her entirely using her effeminate son Peter as a pawn”. Can’t wait to see what that means.
-The Prom: Remember the Ryan Murphy blank check deal with Netflix that I mentioned earlier? Well, another of the projects in the first batch of announcements for the deal is a musical that he’ll direct, adapting the Tony-nominated show about a group of Broadway losers (now played by the one and only Meryl Streep, Nicole Kidman, Andrew Rannells and, uh, James Corden, for some reason) who try to find a viral story to get back in the spotlight, and end up going to a town in Indiana to help a lesbian high school student who has been banned from bringing her girlfriend to the prom. The show has been considered a fun and heartwarming tale of acceptance, so the movie could be an easy pick for an average Academy voter who doesn’t look too hard (and you know that the Golden Globes will nominate the shirt out of this). It’s funny how this comes out the same year than Everybody’s Talking About Jamie, and then it’s not funny realizing that Film Twitter will pit the two movies against each other.
-The Trial of the Chicago 7: After getting a taste of the director’s taste with Molly’s Game, Aaron Sorkin wants more. For his second movie, he’s tackling one of his specialties: a courtroom drama. And this one is a period movie centered around the trial on countercultural activists in the late ‘60s, which immediately attracts a campaign of how “important” this movie is today’s culture. To add the final blow, we have a cast that includes Sacha Baron Cohen, Eddie Redmayne, Yahya Abdul-Mateen II, Jeremy Strong, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Frank Langella, William Hurt, Michael Keaton and Mark Rylance. If Sorkin can contain himself from going over the top (and with that cast, it would be so easy to surrender to bouts of screaming and winding speeches), this could be one of the top contenders.
-Those Who Wish Me Dead: Having made a good splash in the directorial waters with Wind River, Taylor Sheridan (also known for writing the Sicario movies, the Oscar-nominated Hell or High Water or that Yellowstone show that your uncle raves about on Facebook) returns with yet another modern Western. For this thriller based on the Michael Koryta novel, Angelina Jolie stars as a survival expert in the Montana wilderness who is tasked with protecting a teenager who witnessed a murder, while assassins are pursuing him and a wildfire grows closer.
-Untitled David O. Russell Project: Following the mop epic Joy, that came and went in theaters but still netted a Best Actress nomination for Jennifer Lawrence, the angriest director in Hollywood took a bit of a break (it didn’t help that he tried to do a really expensive show with Amazon starring Robert De Niro and Julianne Moore that fell apart when the Weinstein exposes sank everything). Now, he’s quickly putting together his return to the days of Oscar love that came with stuff like The Fighter, Silver Linings Playbook and American Hustle, with a new movie that is set to star Christian Bale, Margot Robbie and Michael B. Jordan. Even though we don’t know many details (some people are saying the movie is called Amsterdam) except for the fact the movie hasn’t started shooting yet, David is a quick guy, so he’ll get it ready for the fall festival circuit. If there’s one thing that David O. Russell knows (apart from avoid getting cancelled for abusing people like Lily Tomlin, Amy Adams and his niece), it’s to make loud actor showcases.
-Untitled Nora Fingscheidt Project: When Bird Box became one of the biggest hits on Netflix history, the streamer decided to keep itself in the Sandra Bullock business. Sandy’s next project for Ted Sarandos is a drama where she plays a woman who is released from prison after serving time for a violent crime, and re-enters a society that refuses to forgive her past. To get redemption, she searches her younger sister she was forced to leave behind. With the direction of Fingscheidt, who comes from an acclaimed directorial debut with Systemsprenger (Germany’s submission to the last Academy Awards), and a cast that also includes Viola Davis, Vincent D’Onofrio and Jon Bernthal, this will also hopefully try its luck later this year.
-Untitled Paul Thomas Anderson Project: We don’t know if this movie will be ready for the end of the year (although last time, he managed to sneak Phantom Thread under the buzzer and earn several Oscar nominations, including Best Picture), but PTA is apparently gonna start to shoot it soon, with the backing of Focus Features. After several movies with prestige locations and intricate production design, Film Twitter’s Holy Spirit will go back to the San Fernando Valley in the 1970s, to tell the story of a high school student who is also a successful child actor.
-Stillwater: Tom McCarthy’s recent career is certainly puzzling. After delivering the weird lows of The Cobbler, he bounced back with the Best Picture winner that was Spotlight. And following that, he… helped produce the 13 Reasons Why series. And following that… he made Timmy Failure: Mistakes Were Made, a Disney+ original movie. Now, he’s back to the award race with a drama starring Matt Damon, who plays a father who rushes from Oklahoma to France to help his daughter (Abigail Breslin), who is in prison after being suspected for a murder she claims she didn’t commit.
-West Side Story: To close things, we have to see one of the possible big contenders of the season, Steven Spielberg’s adaptation of the iconic musical that translates Romeo and Juliet to the context of a street gang war in 1950s New York. While the decision to adapt again something that has been a classic both in Broadway and in movie theaters almost 60 years ago is a challenge, the idea of Spielberg doing a musical closer to the stage version with Tony Kushner as the writer is too tempting for the average Academy voter, who is already saving a spot in major categories in case Steven nails it in December. However, there’s two question marks. First, how well will Ansel Elgort and newcomer Rachel Zegler stand out in the roles of Tony and Maria? And second, will In the Heights steal some of the thunder of this movie by being, you know, more modern?
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2020.02.07 15:52 LukeWilsonStupidNose ‘Do you want to do a superhero movie?’ - answers from directors, writers, actors and actresses (2020 update)

I did one of these a couple years ago and people seemed to like it, but I figured it could use an update.
Take these with a grain of salt, of course, this is more for fun than anything. It’s a pretty long post so I’d probably recommend just skimming through for any names you’re interested in.
Pedro Almodóvar
It’s too big for me! I like to see what I’m doing, to direct movies the same day. You have to wait too long to see the results. I like being able to impose my opinion as a director. I’ve made 21 movies. I’m used to doing it the way I like, not fitting with the Hollywood system. (Vulture, 2019)
Darren Aronofsky
You never know. I mean, Superman would always be interesting. But they’re already deep into reinventing him, so that’s not going to happen for a long time. I think with those films you have to be careful because they are about communicating with as big an audience as you possibly can. Audiences who go to see those films expect a certain type of movie. (CinePop, 2017)
Gemma Arterton
I’m not really into superheroes and stuff like that. But you never know. (HeyUGuys, 2015)
Olivier Assayas
I mean, I enjoy it as a viewer. I don’t think I would touch it as a filmmaker, but I can certainly understand the fun one has with that material, not to mention the admiration I’ve always had for the writers and artists of the comic books. Once in a while, I still do read X-Men comics. I’m just fascinated by the complexity of the narratives and the ambition of the storytelling, which is way beyond whatever they’re doing in the movies. (AV Club, 2015)
Ari Aster
I’ve received some really enticing and cool offers, and I certainly want to hear what the offers are, but I am self-generating. I have so many films I want to make that I’ve written that are so vivid in my head.... Never say never, I definitely want to look at everything that comes my way, but it’ll take a lot to pull me away from these projects that are sort of on the tip of my tongue and that I’m ready to make. (Happy Sad Confused, 2019)
Michael Bay
I wouldn’t want to, it’s not my thing, it’s just not my gig. (Collider, 2016)
Orlando Bloom
I do read [the Marvel comics] a little bit. Who’s the British one? Captain Britain! There you go. Terrible costume, though. (BBC Radio 2, 2018)
Emily Blunt
Not particularly. (Variety, 2018)
Bong Joon-ho
I don’t think Marvel would ever want a director like me. I don’t expect any offers from them anytime soon. Of their movies, I did enjoy the films by James Gunn and James Mangold’s Logan, and I think there are great directors who can handle great projects like that. (Variety, 2020)
John Boyega
I sat down with Marvel years ago, but that’s not the direction I want to go at all. (ComicBook, 2019)
Danny Boyle
I wouldn’t be very good at it. I saw the Spider-Man movie, the animation, and I thought it was wonderful, but out of my league. Normally when you see a movie like that, you think, “I could maybe do that.” I didn’t think “Maybe” with this. It had a sensibility that felt truthful to its origins. Whoever made this, it is part of their bloodstream. You’ve got to recognise that you have no idea how to get there. I don’t think you should attempt one unless it’s in your bloodstream... Comics really aren’t in my bloodstream. (Empire, 2019)
Alison Brie
I would love to. I think especially after working on GLOW, where we all felt like we were superheroes, in a way it has satisfied my desire to do something like that. But in some ways it’s only whet my appetite. (Business Insider, 2017)
James Cameron
I’m not the slightest bit interested in laboring in someone else’s house. (Daily Beast, 2017)
Timothée Chalamet
I want to work with good storytellers and good directors on projects that are fresh, and on roles that feel challenging. Like Heath Ledger in The Dark Knight, or Christian Bale in that film, or Tom Hardy and Anne Hathaway in The Dark Knight Rises. If it was something of that caliber, then that’s awesome. (Variety, 2018)
Toni Collette
It’d be super-fun to be a superhero. I’m not averse to any particular budget. I’m just averse to a shitty story. (Metro, 2015)
Olivia Colman
I’ve always wanted to play a Marvel baddie. I’m not sure I fit the mould, though. Like a powerful, extraordinary woman. Somebody with superpowers would be really fun, but I’m not sure how many middle-aged women they have in Marvel. (Vulture, 2016)
Sofia Coppola
I love making small low-budget films where I am really allowed to do it the way I want, and I think when you have those huge franchises there are a lot of cooks in the kitchen and meetings in conference rooms. But I’d never say never. (The Independent, 2017)
Bryan Cranston
I don’t want to do a character that has been done several times before. I don’t want to be compared, like, “Well, his Commissioner Gordon was yada yada yada.” I don’t want to do that. I want to take something that hasn’t been done. (ScreenGreek, 2018)
Tom Cruise
I’ll never say no if I find something that’s interesting, and I think an audience would like to see it, and they’re going to be entertained by it, and I feel like I can contribute something. (MTV, 2018)
Guillermo del Toro
Well, I co-wrote a whole screenplay on Justice League Dark for Warner Bros., so that’s your answer. I love Deadman, I love Demon, I love Swamp Thing, Zatanna. That’s a universe, is one thing. I’m very attracted to that side of the DC universe. But I’m not a superhero guy. For me to like a superhero, the superhero needs to be a monster. (ComicBook, 2019)
Leonardo DiCaprio
You never know. They’re getting better and better as far as complex characters in these movies. I haven’t yet. But no, I don’t rule out anything. (ShortList, 2015)
Zac Efron
I would do it in a second. I’m just waiting for the right opportunity. (Elle, 2017)
Taron Egerton
I love Marvel and I love the movies and I’d love the excuse to get in shape. (Variety, 2019)
Robert Eggers
Absolutely not. (Bloody Disgusting, 2019)
Cynthia Erivo
Yes. My body is suited to it. And I’d love to see what that experience is like. I think I could have a good time doing it. (Hollywood Reporter, 2020)
Giancarlo Esposito
I love those guys at Marvel. We’ve been trying to figure out how to collaborate on something. (ComicBook, 2016)
Rebecca Ferguson
I don’t think my goal is to throw myself into Marvel university. I love their stories, some of their characters are great, but I do it for the stories, for the people you work with, for the directors. We’ll see. (Metro, 2016)
David Fincher
Maybe. I was open to doing a zombie movie. I think in terms of stories — I don’t want to have to go and they say, “Okay, you have to dream up something for Meteor Man.” Or whatever. I don’t want to have to cobble together something around a pre-existing mask or uniform or cape or idea. (SXSW, 2019)
Jodie Foster
No, not interested in the franchise hero, superhero movie at all. It’s just not what I do. I’m glad other people do it and there’s always been those kinds of films, and there will always be those kinds of movies. It’s just now there’s been kind of, there’s a word for it in business where features as a business model have been more keen on, 95 percent of what they do is $200 million plus action films that appeal to all four quadrants that are these high-risk action films. It’s just not what I do. (ScreenCrush, 2018)
Cary Fukunaga
No, not really. I feel like they’ve all been taken... I do think there’s a place to make intelligent, big films. It depends on sensibility, too. I loved Guardians of the Galaxy. (Vulture, 2015)
Greta Gerwig
I would be open to doing a bigger film but at the same time I think, for me, one of the guiding principles of what I try to do to make my career as I have tried to make it, I always have a sense of what I would drop everything for and I think the thing that I would drop everything for is my own work that I write and that I make. It’s not that I’m not interested in those things, it’s just that they don’t come first. (Silver Screen Riot, 2015)
Hugh Grant
[I was recently offered one, but] there was a scheduling and family issue. Otherwise, I was absolutely up for it. It was a juicy role. It was a baddie. I love a good baddie. (Variety, 2019)
James Gray
I have no problem with Marvel. I’ve taken my children to Marvel movies and it’s a great experience — a bonding experience. It’s beautiful, and those films are brilliantly made. I loved the first Captain America. Terrific movie. So it’s not about shitting on them. The problem is not that — the problem is only that. It’s like if you went to the supermarket and you saw only one brand of cereal. Special K is all they had. Special K is not a bad-tasting cereal, but if that’s the only one you could get it would be awfully frustrating. If the movie business starts catering to smaller and smaller groups, it’s going to start hurting itself in a major way. I would argue that it already has. It’s my job as a director to try and push back against that a little bit. (IndieWire, 2019)
Eva Green
I really like physical stuff, actually. Even 300, I loved doing the training. It was thrilling to play that very strong woman. You get out of your head as an actor and you find the character through physical training. I’d love to do more of the superhero stuff. (ComingSoon, 2019)
Jon Hamm
It depends on the script, what the story is. I am a huge comic book fan, always have been. I have read comic books since I was nine or younger. And I am pretty knowledgeable about a lot of them. And I like the genre, and I like when they are done well. (Hollywood Reporter, 2018)
Armie Hammer
I haven’t seen a superhero movie in a long time where I thought, “Fuck, I wish I was in that.” You know? So for me there’s not, like, a huge rush. (Happy Sad Confused, 2017)
Neil Patrick Harris
I’d love to be some sort of villain in a big-budget action movie. Or a superhero franchise. That’d be rad. (Interview Magazine, 2015)
Ethan Hawke
I guess I’ve been offered things like that that didn’t appeal to me. You have to be careful about what you’re famous for. You don’t want to be famous for something you don’t love. It brings people a lot of pain when that happens. (ScreenCrush, 2018)
Lucas Hedges
I don’t see myself signing a long-term contract. That sounds frightening. Some of those actors who are in those movies really make challenging material work. That’s really impressive. I don’t see that as a challenge I’m dying to take on. (Hollywood Reporter, 2019)
Taraji P. Henson
I would love to be a Marvel superhero. (The New York Times, 2017)
Ron Howard
I’ve had opportunities over the years. I really feel like you shouldn’t make a movie as a kind of exercise. You have to be all the way in. I was never a comic book guy. I like the movies when I see them, especially the origin stories. I never felt like I could be on the set, at 3 o’clock in the morning, tired, with 10 important decisions to make, and know, intuitively, what the story needs. (Happy Sad Confused, 2015)
Glenn Howerton
If Marvel came along and wanted me to play a superhero, I probably would because I think that would be really, really fun. (GQ, 2018)
Charlie Hunnam
I didn’t grow up a comic book fan and I haven’t really seen any of those Marvel films or the Batman films. It’s just not really my taste.... It’s not part of my vision for my career or what I aspire to. (Yahoo, 2017) taste.
Peter Jackson
I’m not a superhero guy. (Empire, 2019)
Lily James
I want to do more action. I want to be a superhero. (Refinery29, 2016)
Barry Jenkins
I’m friends with Ryan Coogler, and just seeing his path from Fruitvale Station to Black Panther, and seeing that his voice has arrived at Black Panther intact and he’s creating on this scale that I think has far more reach than the scale I’m creating on right now. Yeah, if the right character presented itself — I can’t imagine Ryan directing Doctor Strange, I just can’t. But I think even superheroes are characters. And I think what Ryan did so well in Black Panther was showing the human being that T’Challa is. So, if something like that presented itself, yeah, I’d be interested. So long as I had the freedom to create the way I create. (Houston Chronicle, 2018)
Charlie Kaufman
Of course. But — no one wants me to do that. (IndieWire, 2016)
Jennifer Kent
The opportunity has been there if I really wanted to pursue that path and it still probably is to some extent. I am excited by this aboriginal Marvel character, Manifold. Aboriginal culture is the oldest culture in the earth; it’s so sophisticated and deep. It would interest me to take that out to the planet. There could be some amazing story there. (IndieWire, 2019)
John Krasinski
I would love to be in the Marvel universe. I love those movies because they’re fun, but I also think they’re really well done. And certainly a lot of my friends are in those movies. (Total Film, 2020)
Mila Kunis
No, that’s a lot of working out. Lots of those people are hungry, and you have to be because you have to be in shape and I don’t want to be hungry for 10 years. (MTV, 2018)
David Lowery
I grew up reading Marvel comic books and it’s a joy to see the aesthetic replicated on screen so thoroughly. Yet the aesthetic is so well-grounded at this point I don’t think there’s anything I could contribute to it. So the answer is likely no. But I do love superheroes, so there might be the right superhero movie out there I may want to delve in. (Maclean’s, 2017)
Rooney Mara
I don’t really get offered those parts, or maybe I do. I don’t even know. Maybe I do and I just don’t even realize it and just say no to them. For me it’s just all about the director and it’s all about the script and the story. (Deadline, 2016)
Matthew McConaughey
I did Sing, I did Kubo and the Two Strings. But other than that I’m like, what have I done that my kids can see? ... I’ll be there in a little while! I’ll do something. (Fandango, 2018)
Adam McKay
We’re always kind of talking. I think Feige is just the greatest, and what they’re doing is amazing. (Happy Sad Confused, 2018)
Christopher McQuarrie
I must tell you, the possibility of my doing a superhero movie is remote in the extreme. (Twitter, 2019)
Sam Mendes
The funniest letter I got — they were sending [a packet for] The Avengers, right? For directors to pitch — and I got a package, which was full of comic books, but no treatment; there was no script. But the cover letter said “Marvel’s Avengers will be released on May 3, 2012” or whatever it was. That was the first sentence of the cover letter. Not, “We have the pleasure of enclosing the materials…” or “Here is the script for…” But the release date.... I mean, that’s not my world particularly. I’ll go see it, particularly with my kids, but I didn’t want to make it. (Moviefone, 2012)
Sienna Miller
I feel quite content. It’s a huge commitment to have the ambition to be playing those parts and to be doing those roles. I don’t know that I have that, the ambition that it takes, the drive that it takes. Yes, I think I have subconsciously shied away from that, I think the idea of that is daunting. (The Guardian, 2017)
Helen Mirren
Oh yes! ... I’d probably have to be the baddie. You know, because I’m British. (CineMovie, 2013)
Viggo Mortensen
I’m just looking for good stories, and the ones I’ve happened to find and commit to have happened to be in other countries, or are independent films. I’m not trying to avoid any kind of budget or genre of movies. (LA Times, 2016)
Elisabeth Moss
I don’t think I’m good at the whole green screen thing, but I’m not averse to trying it out. I’m more into, like, a weird concentration camp miniseries [laughs]. That’s a sure path to my own Marvel movie. (MovieMaker Magazine, 2019)
Carey Mulligan
I don’t think I would be very good in something like that. (The Resident, 2018)
Eddie Murphy
No! I’m going to be 60 in a year. Who would I play? The old brotherman? I guess that’d be the character.... Man, fuck that. I can’t be standing around in a movie with a stick and shit, pointing and telling people, “Oh, you should do this or that.” I’m just not down with the whole superhero movie thing. But, if I had to, I guess I could play a villain or some shit like that. (IndieWire, 2019)
David Oyelowo
I tread with caution around the notion of those kinds of characters. Depending on which one of them you’re playing, there’s always a danger you’re going to get so identified with this larger than life character that it could become tougher for audiences to believe you in other roles. (The Wrap, 2015)
Al Pacino
I would do anything that I could understand in terms of how I fit in it. And you know, of course if I could fit in it. Anything’s possible. You know, I did Dick Tracy and I got an Oscar nomination, so come on. (Deadline, 2014)
Dev Patel
I had a wee bit of a scarring experience when I attempted to be a part of a franchise, and it didn’t quite hit the mark. It makes you evaluate what kind of mark you want to leave on the industry. (Esquire, 2016)
Jordan Peele
So many of those properties — it’s a childhood dream to be able to essentially see what you saw in your imagination as a child, watching or reading or whatever you were doing with that stuff. It’s a filmmaker’s dream. But you know, I feel like I only have so much time. I have a lot of stories to tell, and it just doesn’t feel right. It just doesn’t feel right. I’m a comic book and graphic novel appreciator, but I can’t call myself a true fan boy. (Rolling Stone, 2019)
Sean Penn
You asked me with a camera on this face and in this time of my life if I would be a superhero? (laughs) Maybe, if there’s a very funny one. (Reuters, 2015)
Brad Pitt
I don’t think so. I think there’s enough. I don’t think I have anything to add. (24 Oras, 2019)
Daniel Radcliffe
If it was good enough and something I was interested in. I’m not sure if I’d sign up for something that was another seven or eight films or ten years, but a shorter franchise, yeah. (Business Insider, 2016)
Lynne Ramsay
When I was 15 or 16, I had a boyfriend who was an obsessive fan [of comics]. His apartment was so full of comic-books he made a path through the boxes to get places.... My boyfriend at the time was always on about the psychology of the characters, the ones that he really liked tended to have these strange histories. A lot of them are quite Freudian and strange. I liked Bill Sienkiewicz’s work, and Alan Moore is so special.
The ones I liked were deeply, darkly screwed-up reflections of the world – where you can see how they became what they became and that past was super-psychological.... There’s some amazing things in graphic novels and comic-books, and they taught me a lot about filmmaking as well. Someone said to me that You Were Never Really Here’s like a graphic novel. I think I’ve learned a lot about filmmaking through comic-books, in terms of how to tell a story visually. That had an influence on me. If you’re able to do it without a committee, with a real set approach to it, where you have freedom and people trust you, that would be amazing. (Yahoo, 2018)
Eddie Redmayne
I love the films. You know how in summer, when studios compete for people to see their summer blockbusters, I am their dream. I see all of them. I would never rule out the opportunity to be in one. (The Sun, 2015)
Nicolas Winding Refn
I love Hollywood. I love glamour and glitz. I love camp. I love vanity, I love egos, I indulge in all that, but the bigger kind of approaches or the offers that have come my way or the interest, in the end, I’ve always just felt that I wasn’t the right person in the end for it. Doesn’t mean that it won’t happen. I mean I would love to do one of those comic book movies. (Collider, 2019)
Kelly Reichardt
There’s absolutely no danger of that happening [laughs]. But maybe there’s something for me somewhere in between that and my sort of films. I did really enjoy doing my little wagon crash in Meek’s Cutoff. It was one of the most fun things I ever did, and I suddenly realized, “Oh, this is why people love to smash things up. It’s so much fun!” (Variety, 2016)
Boots Riley
I have a problem with superheroes in general, because, politically, superheroes are cops. Superheroes work with the government to uphold the law. And who do the laws work for? Put it like this: We all love bank robbers, because we know that in the two sides of that equation, the robbers are the ones to root for, not the banks. Only in superhero movies and the news do they try to make us think we’re against the bank robbers. (The New York Times, 2018)
Guy Ritchie
I’m up for it.... I’m a guy that likes to work so I’m gonna work. And I’ll work with whatever I can to make it work. I’m not an absolutist about what a genre is so I’m not a no-man, I’m a yes-man when it comes to making something manifest. (Variety, 2017)
Gina Rodriguez
I would love to be a superhero—that’s all I want to do is play a superhero. (E! Online, 2015)
Saoirse Ronan
If a script came along that was strong, interesting, original, I would take it. A good script is a good script. (Vogue, 2018)
Winona Ryder
No one is banging my door down to be a superhero. I don’t know how good I would be. I have low bone density, so I don’t know if anyone really wants to put me in a cape and chuck me out a window. (Collider, 2016)
Josh Safdie
A studio offered us to do a sequel to this huge comic-book thing. We just said, “No, we don’t wanna do that!” But we are interested in working in the studio system. (The Independent, 2017)
Andrew Scott
Absolutely, I wouldn’t say no. But it very much depends on the character. And what exactly it is that you’re doing. I’ve definitely had conversations about that world before, but as yet, it hasn’t transpired. So for me, it just depends on the acting requirement. The films are definitely really cool. So, I don’t know. We’ll wait and see. (Digital Spy, 2019)
Amanda Seyfried
They’re highly enjoyable. I love being an audience member. I just don’t want to put on the suit. Nope, I’m not into [stunts]. That’s not where I see my career going. (Late Night with Seth Meyers, 2015)
Alexander Skarsgård
If you do it with the right tone, then sure. (The Guardian, 2015)
Steven Soderbergh
Well, look, those movies are bananas. I see some of them and I’m like, “I couldn’t direct 30 seconds of that.” Just because so much of my time would be spent on things I’m ultimately not interested in. You look at my career, and it’s mostly just two people in a room. Two people in a room to me is exciting. If you look at history, it's the way gigantic things happen; it’s the result of two people in a room. I’ve always felt that was the richest tapestry you could come up with. So anything that isn’t about that, I’m immediately kind of like, “Well, why isn’t it two people in a room?” So you’re just spending all this time having conversations with VFX people, instead of with actors about what the scene is. And that’s what I’m interested in. It’s not that I’m a snob. It’s just that I wasn’t into comic books as a kid, and I’m not interested in things that don’t have to do with performance. (W Magazine, 2017)
Aaron Sorkin
I happen to have meetings coming up with both DC and Marvel. I have to go into these meetings and tell them as respectfully as I can that I’ve never read a comic book. It’s not that I don’t like them. It’s just that I’ve never been exposed to one. So, I’m hoping that somewhere in their library is a comic book character that I’m gonna love and I’m gonna wanna go back and start reading from the first issue on. (ComicBook, 2017)
Lakeith Stanfield
I would love to play the Joker. That’d be beautiful. (Jimmy Kimmel Live, 2020)
Kristen Stewart
I think maybe what I’ve learned is that I don’t want to do another [big franchise] ever again [laughs] … No, I mean, sure. Maybe. I never really limit myself. (Konbini, 2019)
Justin Theroux
There are younger guys than me that are better at it than I am. I’ll leave it up to them. (Vulture, 2014)
Jean-Marc Vallée
If the script is great, yeah. But so far, it’s not my cup of tea. (Hollywood Reporter, 2016)
Paul Verhoeven
If I could add some other level to it, but if it's the same as whatever those other people are doing right now, then no. No! I'm not saying it's not possible, but, like, when they wanted to pit Batman against Superman [laughs, hands flailing] My God! (Metro, 2016)
Denis Villeneuve
No, because I’m not from that culture. I’m French-Canadian which means that my culture is European. I was influenced by authors from France and Belgium, and Europeans are graphic novelists. Honestly, I know very little about most of them. (Happy Sad Confused, 2017)
Mark Wahlberg
I’m not leaving my trailer in a cape. (American Film Market, 2016)
Lulu Wang
[Big movies like that are] really made by committee. And that’s one of the reasons I don’t want to do it right now. Because I haven’t figured out my voice yet as a filmmaker. (Hollywood Reporter, 2019)
Denzel Washington
I haven’t been approached. You know, we’ll see what happens. (Joe.ie, 2018)
Ben Wheatley
They usually take people after two films, and [Free Fire was] film six. So you can safely say they’ll not come fucking knocking on my door. (Q&A, 2017)
Olivia Wilde
Totally, yeah. Absolutely. (MTV, 2019)
Evan Rachel Wood
I would love to be a superhero or something. (Cinephiled, 2014)
Steven Yeun
I’d like to do anything, if it comes my way and moves me I’m into it. (South China Morning Post, 2020)
submitted by LukeWilsonStupidNose to movies [link] [comments]


2019.12.20 21:00 DangerDylan [Friday, 20. December]

World News

Evangelical magazine Christianity Today calls for Trump's removal after impeachment: Publication founded by televangelist Billy Graham splits with Trump’s base, calling president’s actions ‘immoral’
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Facebook faces another huge data leak affecting 267 million users
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'Deeply cruel' Boris Johnson faces backlash after axing protections for child refugees, as Rees-Mogg reappears for first time since blaming Grenfell victims
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All news, US and international.

A vegan couple have been charged with first-degree murder after their 18-month-old son starved to death on a diet of only raw fruit and vegetables
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If you made a claim for $125 from Equifax, you’re not getting it after court awards nearly $80 million to attorneys
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19-year-old Chrystul Kizer faces life in prison for killing accused pedophile who allegedly abused her
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Reddit Science

New CDC study suggests that paid leave benefits — along with business practices that actively encourage employees to stay home while sick — are both necessary to reduce the transmission of ARI and influenza in workplaces.
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Some parents have noticed that their autistic children’s behavioral symptoms diminished after a fever. A new study from MIT and Harvard in mice found that an immune molecule sometimes produced during infection suppresses a small region of the brain’s cortex linked to social behavioral deficits.
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A 2,700-year-old cuneiform tablet from ancient Iraq describing medical treatments has suddenly revealed a secret – a hitherto overlooked drawing of the demon that the ancient Assyrians thought caused epilepsy. It is the earliest illustration of a demon that can be associated with epilepsy.
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/Technology

Robocall fines rise to $10,000 per call under newly passed law
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Twitter removes nearly 6,000 accounts for being part of a state-backed information operation originating in Saudi Arabia
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Cox owes $1 billion to record labels for harboring music pirates, jury decides
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Sadly, this is not the Onion.

Detroit's largest demolition contractor demolishes the wrong home — again
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If you made a claim for $125 from Equifax, you’re not getting it after court awards nearly $80 million to attorneys
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Middle-of-the-night 'gun fight' turns out to be four men in Nerf-gun battle
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Ask Reddit...

People living in small towns, what’s the recent scandal?
Comments
You get 24 hours to prepare, and you get paid $10,000 to stay in your room for an entire week with no internet/data connection/television. Can't leave. Do you do it? And if so, what do you do in the meantime?
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Because of an epidemic Earth is going back into the Middle Ages. Only 1% of the population is still alive, and there's no electricity. What skills or items do you have to help you survive the longest?
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Sysadmin

PSA: If a company is unwilling to provide pay range for an advertised position that they are reaching out to you for until after the interview, it means they are looking to low-ball you.
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Today I am sharing a few of my smaller powershell scripts. As always improvements is more than welcome :)
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Today I learned I no longer allowed to call our ISP.
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Microsoft SQL Server

Website with SQL Server Exercises
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Python script to do SQL Server backup and upload to s3
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Distributed Availability Group with single replica AG
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PowerShell

The Ultimate Guide to Building REST APIs with PowerShell
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Huge json file: "Get-Content : Insufficient memory to continue"
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Hiding popup windows on powershell .exe?
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Functional 3D Printing

Saved my suitcase from a landfill. Flying today and forgot my wheel bracket was trashed from the last time, 3D printing to the rescue. Petg bracket and axle, tpu wheel, bearing installed on the inside.
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My office got a pool table for the holidays but it was missing a Pool Ball Rack!!
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An annoying to open liquor bottle cage for a Yankee Swap gift
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Data Is Beautiful

[OC] TeamTrees - Road to 20 Million 🌲
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[OC] Update: What worries Reddit? What 1000 people messaged me about over 2 years
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[OC] Voting Members of U.S. Congress by Political Party, Gender, and Race
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Today I Learned (TIL)

TIL only three people in the nation were qualified to hand-pack the parachutes for Apollo 15. Their expertise was so vital, they were not allowed to ride in the same car together for fear that a single auto accident could cripple the space program.
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TIL That only 14 years after almost the entire Choctaw population was forcibly relocated in the Trail of Tears, the tribe donated $170 (over $5,000 today) to victims of the Potato Famine in Ireland, creating a bond between the two peoples that lasts to today.
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TIL In 2011 two Hollywood films opened just 5 months apart from each other that had the exact same runtime, exact same plot and same ending. “No Strings Attached” with Ashton KutcheNatalie Portman and “Friends With Benefits” with Justin Timberlake/Mila Kunis. They both grossed 150 million dollars.
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So many books, so little time

I am reading Tommyknockers by Stephen King when I found this little Easter egg
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'In 24 hours, people gave us £40,000': how readers rescued a small press
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What makes for a good used bookstore?
Comments

OldSchoolCool: History's cool kids, looking fantastic

My mom was a Boston Pahk Rangah in the 80s
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are my parents kelso and jackie? 1970's
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My great grandfather painted a portrait of my grandmom - Bombay, India 1947
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aviation

First pictures of CMV-22 in COD (Carrier Onboard Delivery) paint scheme
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I just love this splinter camo (Saab Gripen E)
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I 3D printed a 7 cylinder radial engine model.
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Reddit Pics

140 million year Old, 500 Kg dinosaur femur discovered In France, 2019.
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After a lot of people told me that my cat looks like Pennywise in this photo, I decided to add a red balloon for full effect.
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I was just diagnosed with testicular cancer, and I’m having my orchiectomy today. Here’s my 100% accurate representation of what I saw in the x-rays.
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.gifs - funny, animated gifs for your viewing pleasure

The Canadian apocalypse
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In Russia goal scores you
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I moved Adam Driver's eyes down.
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A subreddit for cute and cuddly pictures

The Cats are very concerned as to why Dog isn’t terrorizing them as per usual - and has instead stared at the wall, high af, for 10 minutes straight
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I was doing some work late at night and my cat did this
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I hope this belongs here. I am a dog Walker and I took this photo of one of the puppies I walk. He loves running at me full force. I think this may be the best photo I have ever taken!
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submitted by DangerDylan to DangerDylanTLDR [link] [comments]


2019.06.21 01:42 rotoreuters Twitter Joins Ashton Kutcher And Mila Kunis In Trolling False Divorce Story

Twitter Joins Ashton Kutcher And Mila Kunis In Trolling False Divorce Story submitted by rotoreuters to betternews [link] [comments]


2019.06.21 01:16 thefeedbot Twitter Joins Ashton Kutcher And Mila Kunis In Trolling False Divorce Story

Twitter Joins Ashton Kutcher And Mila Kunis In Trolling False Divorce Story submitted by thefeedbot to TheNewsFeed [link] [comments]


2019.04.17 04:11 elfstar89 RHOBH timeline Part 4

So I reached the max characters for my 1st, 2nd,3rd, and 4th timelines, so now I have 5 parts: Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 5
Part 1: March 2018 to August 2018. Part 2: August 2018 to October 2018. Part 3: October 2018 to February 2019. Part 4: February 2019 to March 2019. Part 5: April 2019 to present.
After LVP's stops filming I don't think my updates to the in season dates will be as detailed. The part of the season when LVP was filming is the most in dispute/controversial, so that's why it will remain the most updated/detailed. * * * FEBRUARY Thurs 2/21: Rinna on Kelly and Ryan, Strahan and Sara, and The Jenny McCarthy Show radio show, and on QVC * On Jenny’s show: * Rinna reveals that she had already heard the Nene-LVP story 4 year ago because she used to have the same manager as Nene. * When the topic turns to LVP filming while mourning Rinna responded to the direct question of whether she could imagine not showing up for two months to a job Rinna answered “ Okay this is what I am going to say first and foremost I understand that everybody’s grieving process is different and our hearts have gone out and we feel so deeply for Lisa Vanderpump and what she went through. In saying that..what I’m the most disappointed in is the fact that she did not reach out to any of us..you know I’ve known Lisa a long time and the fact that she didn’t reach out to me and say you know what I am in pain and I am suffering and I’m gonna need to take a medical leave of absence, go heal, and every single one of us would have said you know what go heal, go do what you need to do, but to not show up for work and to not contact any of us for two and a half months, I’m just so disappointed in that behavior because I would have imagined she’s got 400 employees, I couldn’t imagine if one of her employees did that, they’d be fired, so the fact that Bravo took no..there was no consequences. She was able to just do that. And I guess the problem I have with it is I’m raising 2 teenage girls and Harry and I have raised them to, you show up, you are professional, you are on time, and I don’t care what you are going through, you show up for work, and if you can’t then you say to somebody I am in trouble, help me, so that’s what the most sad about and disappointed because I feel like it’s a really bad example of women in the workplace.” * She replies “I do” when Jenny asks her if she (LVP) gets treated differently by Bravo. They agree that the reason why is because LVP has another hit show on Bravo. Rinna says she is “disappointed in all of them (the honchos at Bravo)” Rinna says that “She (LVP) did half of a season and then guess what we do another half of a season Jenny that is unbelievable” Jenny predicts that LVP will probably still be the topic of conversation for when she is not around, Rinna says “No guess what. You don’t. Cuz out of sight, out of mind, so that’s just the truth of it. We go on to make a really good kick ass show without her” * Rinna says that if she had done what LVP did when Rinna’s father died, she would have been fired. Jenny and Rinna both think that the scene at Vanderpump Dogs was orchestrated by LVP to get the story out there, without it technically being LVP who got it out there. They both point out the LVP is the boss and if you are the boss you tell your employee to shut up or be fired. Rinna claims that LVP fans are sending the cast and their family death threats.
Thurs 2/21: Teddi and Kyle hanging out at Teddi’s house
Sat 2/23: Rinna, Harry, and Nicollette Sheridan get in a Twitter dispute over Rinna's comments in episode 2
Tues 2/25 Episode 3 "Sun and Shade in the Bahamas" airs. (Kyle, Dorit, Teddi, and Denise wrote blogs; LVP, Rinna and Erika did not)
In Teddi's blog, she flat out accuses LVP of directing John B to call her about the dog situation in an effort to use her as a "pawn to get the story about Dorit and the dog out there while LVP can pretend like she had Dorit’s best interests." She admits that in reaction to John B.'s "dramatic" story she said "crappy and shady" things that will be revealed in next week's episode. * In Kyle's blog, she points out "When Dorit called Lisa to tell her what happened and that she had to find a new home for the dog, Lisa seemingly understood Dorit’s position and never asked for the dog to be returned to her or Vanderpump Dogs. To me, that indicates that Lisa V was OK with the dog going to a new home at that time, which makes sense. There are a lot of dogs that need homes, and it’s not always easy to find the right fit. It only became an issue when the dog was left at a shelter by the woman that Dorit thought was giving the dog a good home. It's safe to say that everyone was blindsided by that. Now, the issue has become more about why we all found out about this in the first place. If Lisa knew that Dorit had no ill intent, then it should have been a private matter." * In Dorit's blog, she calls out Kyle "Since Kyle spoke with Teddi about the Lucy situation in their room ahead of drinks and then continued the conversation with Lisa V and Lisa R, it seems like she was the only one who didn’t want the story to die down. Watching it back felt like two mean girls gossiping about me under my nose. I’m perplexed as to why Kyle asked Lisa V if she was still mad at me when Lisa V had done nothing but assure me that she wasn’t. Was Kyle digging for more or simply trying to keep the story’s flame ablaze? Yet, what hurt the most was how Kyle made light of the situation with an insensitive joke about me being allergic to dogs. Watching them talk behind my back and then act normal to my face felt catty and hurtful." * Dorit also calls out LVP "When Lisa V tells me "she doesn’t believe for one second that I’m guilty" and follows it with, “however, it all went wrong,” she is wrongly insinuating that Lucy was in danger. For the record, Lucy never ended up in a kill shelter. She went from our loving home to another loving home and, unbeknown to me, ended up in a non-kill shelter. The shelter was told that Lucy originated from Vanderpump Dogs, so the owner scanned her microchip and contacted Vanderpump Dogs within an hour of Lucy being there. Lucy never suffered or was in harm’s way or, god forbid, in danger of being killed." "The woman who wanted Lucy initially came at a time when PK and I were contemplating giving her back to Lisa V’s center as she was becoming more and more aggressive with the kids. When the opportunity arose for Lucy to go to a beautiful home (which is ultimately the goal for rescue pets) rather than having to go back to the center and wait for someone to adopt her, we took it. It was never about hiding that from Lisa V as I told her immediately. Not even Lisa V could’ve expected this to happen, otherwise (I’m sure) she would’ve done a home check, which she never did." * "This brings me to the second part of what she said: “You should’ve given the dog back to me.” Why didn’t she tell me that she wanted me to bring Lucy back to the center and that it was a violation to re-home a dog when I spoke to her? I would have happily brought Lucy back to Lisa if that was her wish. In hindsight, knowing what I know now, I wish I had just given Lucy back to Lisa V to begin with and not try to do what I thought was right for Lucy. Maybe then the series of events wouldn’t have been twisted into a story about me abandoning this beautiful little puppy that my family and I loved." * "In conclusion, Lisa R telling Lisa V, “This wouldn’t have gone out there if you didn’t want it out there” is undeniable. Judging by what Kyle and Teddi are saying, Lisa V may have counted on Kyle and Teddi (with whom I’ve had differences with in the past) to carry out her plan of either punishing me or simply trying to make me look bad. But I guess that remains to be seen."
Tues 2/25 Dorit on WWHL. Regarding the dog situation: Dorit claims LVP always knew that Lucy was going to a new home as Dorit called her the next day to tell her. She said LVP didn’t ask for the $5,000 penalty when she told her about Lucy going to new home nor did she request that she’d rather Lucy be brought back to Vanderpump Dogs instead. Dorit claims that those issues were only brought up by LVP when they started filming. Dorit says she didn’t take Lucy back to VPD because her and PK thought the woman was a better solution than Lucy being brought back to VPD and having to wait to be adopted again. The woman was someone who knew PK through a business associate of his. Dorit addressed the fake robbery conspiracy theories by stating that the guy was caught.
Tues 2/26 In reference to the previews for episode 4 in which Ken shows LVP texts between Teddi and John B., Teddi tweets "I hope next week Ken doesn’t leave out the part in those messages that confirms Lisa set this up... neat thing about texts is I can print them out as well."
Wed 2/27 Erika shares an example of a threatening tweet a RHOBH viewer sent her which said "Erika Jayne has someone shot your son yet? You could probably care less since you didn't raise him. Maybe he's better off dead" Kyle had also been sent a tweet saying mom dyed because she was finally sick of loving her.
Thurs 2/28 Brandi Glanville tweets about the condolence drama "I would take a sincerely handwritten note over someone’s assistant sending flowers every day all day"
Thurs 2/28 Teddi make an Instagram post addressing the vitriolic messages sent to the casts and asks for people to basically calm down. She also responds to those asking for the cast to post the receipts they claim they have on LVP by saying "I know I chose to do a TV show and I know there is freedom of speech but I am asking you to be mindful of the fact that we are also real people, that your words hurt and that we aren’t allowed to speak about upcoming episodes to defend ourselves or apologize for mistakes until after they air."
Thurs 2/28 Kyle, Rinna, Erika, Dorit, and Teddi have dinner together at Craig's MARCH Fri 3/1 In a response to a comment on her Instagram that said “Vile human being you make me sick. Hope you shrivel up and die Teddi. You only famous for your father. Fat, Teddi responded “Everyone is welcome to say their opinions about the show but wishing someone death is not ok. Enough is enough.”
Sat 3/2 Rinna instastories a scene from a previous reunion in which LVP is lecturing Adienne Maloof about taking responsibility for the actions of her employees
Sat 3/2 Rinna on QVC
Sun 3/3 In an insta Q&A Teddi said that "As soon as I am allowed to show them you will see them" she will post the full text conversations between her and John B.
Mon 3/4 Teddi and Denise hang out in NYC as they are both in town for press Tues 3/5 Episode 4 "Bahama Drama" airs. LVP, Kyle, Rinna, Teddi, and Denise wrote blogs.
In Teddi's blog she admits she played a role in setting Dorit up. "I am now angry at myself for going along with something designed to hurt Dorit, especially when the dog's well-taken care of. I am also angry that LVP would play against my hard feelings with Dorit. That is why this has become about something other than the dog. Had Vanderpump just admitted she was upset with Dorit and wanted the story out there, this would all be put to rest."
In Kyle’s blog she agrees with Camille that the messy situation wouldn’t have happened if Dorit had just given the dog back. She says the dogs story being “put out there” at Vanderpump Dogs seems like a “passive aggressive” move on LVP’s part. Kyle says that the entire matter could have been resolved sooner if LVP had just been upfront that she was upset with Dorit instead of being wishy washy about her feelings and saying that others at Vanderpump Dogs were mad at her.
In LVP’s blog, she says that despite dealing with depression, she tried to commit filming this season. She says her experience filming caused her depression to deepen. LVP admits that she ended her relationship with Kyle because Kyle didn’t believe LVP when she said she wasn’t lying. * LVP blurs the truth of her dog clothes business partner lawsuit by saying her and Ken were “vindicated”. (They settled out of court instead of facing a ruling, and the business partner’s company was shut down not because of their fight with Ken and LVP, but because it lost its non-profit status because it was selling merchandise) * LVP shares her frustrations that Dorit’s run in with Jasmine Leonard was not brought up on camera. (side note: I think all RHOBH fans completely agree with this sentiment- would have loved to have seen this play out on the show) * She claims the women didn’t inquire about how the dog was doing. (This despite Teddi and Kyle having previously seen in person that the dog was fine, and the women being aware that the dog was being what they could only assume well taken care of at Vanderpump Dogs.) * LVP justifies the John’s actions because they are saving lives with the work they do and claims that they did what they did because they were emotional, but then seemingly contradicts herself by implying that the people at Vanderpump Dogs wouldn’t do something to bring attention to the Dorit dog issue because it would put the organization at risk. * LVP insinuates that the environment at the Kemsley household “young children can terrorize a dog” was a possilbe reason Lucy could have been biting because she had no previous history of it as she was not a rescue with a traumatic background, but instead a dog that was birthed at the center. She also claims that Dorit actually never mentioned the biting as a reason for giving Lucy away when Dorit called to inform her that she had given her to the woman. * LVP slams Kyle and Teddi for doing what one would think is a solid by filming at one of her organizations Vanderpump Dogs, thus giving it air time. “I was told that they were there for grooming and Instagram pictures. Kyle even forgot to bring her dog – she must’ve had something else on her mind.” (Teddi and Kyle have no Instagram photos posted from that day (mind you Instagram photos help promote Vanderpump Dogs and LVP has the cast of VPR take them there all the time; Teddi didn’t have a dog at that point to groom; don’t know what Kyle’s excuse was) * To end her blog in her trademark innuendo style, LVP refers to her cast mates as bitches and cunts. * Tues 3/5 Teddi live tweeted episode 4 and posted more texts between her and John Blizzard with additional context in response to the texts Ken showed LVP: Text Teddi shows at table, which Teddi claims implicates Ken More texts that Teddi claims show LVP and Ken's involvement and foreknowledge Teddi shoots down the idea that Rinna was trying to turn her and Kyle against LVP. Teddi calls BS on the idea that LVP doesn’t really know John Blizzard as LVP suggested in the episode
Tues 3/5 Denise on WWHL; Denise says that she agrees with Erika taking a picture of the condolence note because she's learned that it's important to have receipts. Wed 3/6 Teddi’s interview on the Jenny McCarthy Show
Notable quotes
“I know in the end, I have a clear conscience. It’s gonna be rocky to get there, but I know and there is not a doubt in my mind that the truth will prevail.” * In response to Jenny saying that LVP is known for manipulation “I kind of took her nightly calls (during Teddi’s first season) as like oh she’s checking on me, but really I was pretty much getting groomed. There are a lot of things that I’m like you know I fell for this, I made the wrong decision, I’m not a dummy, why did I do this, and I’ve made mistakes…I say in all my blogs I’m not clean in all of this” * In response to why she went along with the plan to make Dorit look bad “You want me to be real frank? Because I was new and the main housewife called me you know like had somebody call and say Lisa wants you know to put you out there.” (Editorializing here, but one of the texts that Teddi sends John B. when he tells her that Ken and LVP are in disagreement about spreading what Dorit did “Lisa is the cast member so her word rules” is supportive of this idea that Teddi was enamored by LVP) * In response to if LVP could come back from this aka repair her relationships with the group “Here’s the thing…All she would really have to say for everybody to you know is ‘Guys. I’m sorry. I let things get too far. I should have just said Dorit I’m upset with you and you know what I was not in a good place and just you know what all of us are understanding people especially in this setting you know I’m not saying she needs to like be like I’m so sorry (in a groveling way) but like you know what I let it get out of hand” In response to why LVP has such a hard time owning up to her faults/mistakes “Because then she wouldn’t be perfect and then she can’t be admired and the queen” * “I only just know how I personally handle things, so even last year when Dorit and I were not in a good place and we’re required to write blogs and then people would like attack Dorit. I would post on Twitter like guys cool it like we are all doing the best we can even though I’m writing this in the blog…I’m required to say how I’m feeling, but she doesn’t need those types of attacks. If you notice, that’s not happening this year. Lisa is not saying hey guys you know this is all it’s fine to have favorites and blah blah blah but let’s not go to death threats for my cast mates.
Wed 3/6 Faith a former VPR cast member tweeted “I believe her (Teddi). I’ve have first hand accounts with Lisa trying to manipulate a scene or story line” and later followed up with this “No shade Lisa is just a great producer!”
Thurs 3/7 Teddi confessional silver top redux
Thurs 3/7 Rinna claims that because she feels that LVP is using the Vanderpump Dogs drama on RHOBH this season to drum up interest in a Vanderpump Dogs spin off that she feels entitled to monetary compensation.
Fri 3/8 LVP retweeted than unretweeted a stan account calling for the firing of the rest of the cast
Tues 3/12 Episode 5 “The Proof Hurts” airs. Kyle, Teddi, and Denise wrote blog.
In Teddi’s blog, she admits that she should have told the group the whole story the first chance she got.
In Kyle’s blog, she addresses some things she’s seen on social media “I want to address some things I see “out there” ( on Twitter etc). Just to be clear to those of you who have said I have "attacked Lisa,” I have not even had an argument with Lisa at this point. We had a nice lunch in the Bahamas and at dinner, in the Bahamas, I tried to get her to stay. We flew home together. We continued to make plans together.”
“Another misconception is that nobody cares about the dog and only "what Lisa did to Dorit.” We ALL care about what happened to the dog. Not only do we know the dog was safe but the final version of what happened to Lucy put all our minds at ease as to how it was handled. Which also explained why Lisa was not upset with Dorit as she claimed.”
Tues 3/12 Kyle on WWHL; Andy announces that Kyle is the first housewife that met his son. In response to a caller about the situation, Kyle says that she had heard about the Nene-LVP Pump situation before Nene went public with it and can’t think of a reason why Nene would make up that story. Kyle says that people keep on saying that the women should be concerned about the dog, but Kyle says that she knew from episode 1 that she was safe at Vanderpump Dogs…that was the first time Kyle had heard about or seen Lucy, so she had no opportunity to be concerned prior to that.
Wed 3/13 RHOBH fans harassed Sophia, Kyle’s daughter, on her Instagram comments about her admission to college in the midst of the college admission scandal that made news the same day an episode about her going to college aired.
Wed 3/13 In a Insta Q&A Teddi was asked: “Are you and Blizzard still friends?” She replied “I used to do charity events for Vanderpump Dogs so I got to socially know him through doing those events and bc Slate would want to go into Vanderpump Dogs to play with puppies. He works there. We would small talk about tv shows anc pop culture but we never once hung out at a non vanderpump related function. I haven’t spoken to him since my last charity ride (9/13). I am not mad at him. He did what his boss wanted him to do but I feel no need to be in any communication with him.
Thurs 3/14 Kyle Dorit, and Teddi plus Faye, Kathy, Paris, and Nicky attend a Balmain event.
Tues 3/19 Kyle confessional with blue snake skin blouse and hair halfway up.
Tues 3/19 Dorit confessional with black mesh and Chanel earrings
Tues 3/19 Episode 6 “Fifty Shades of Shade” airs. Rinna, Teddi, and Denise wrote blogs. In Teddi’s blog, she takes us through her thought process during puppygate.
On what was going on in her head at Vanderpump Dogs “When Blizzard called me to tell me the dog story, I was told that Dorit kept the dog locked in her basement and it hadn’t seen the sun in months; obviously, I was told this inflamed tale to get me to react. And I did in the moment. But I did not reveal the story that day at Vanderpump Dogs as I was originally supposed to. THAT is what I mean when I kept saying I didn’t go through with it. Yes, I made a reference to the dog when John brought her out, but once LVP started with her “resistance,” I knew something was askew. Watch the scene back. Everybody was confused.”
On why she suggested in the texts that the dog needed to be brought out “Of course, I asked to have the dog there. When making a plan to bring a story up, I wasn’t just going to do it out of thin air.”
She challenges LVP’s defense “LVP also can’t keep her story straight about how and when she found out I knew. She said multiple times she’s had no communication with Blizzard (lie) and that John Sessa “had no idea Blizzard and Teddi was interacting” (lie), but yet she texted Dorit immediately after I was told that “Teddi knows.”
“Please think about it: Why would John Blizzard come to me with this information and plan to bring this story out on camera, risking his position and relationship with a company and family he’s known and worked for for years? The only way any of this makes sense is if LVP was behind it all.”
Tues 3/19 Teddi on WWHL (pre-taped- probably from when she did press in NY 3/4 or 3/5)
On whether she can still claim that she doesn’t lie after she omitted parts of the story: “Well I was a little cagey in the Bahamas because the original story I was told about the dog was gnarly, and so my response was gnarly because I was told a very different story that ended up not being the truth” Andy ask who told her the story, she replies “I first get a call from John Blizzard and he was like hey Dorit is not calling Lisa back, so she’s gonna text her Teddi knows and it just all spiraled from there”
On what did you leave out that she said would hurt Dorit Calling Dorit a narcissist in the text after being told the dog story for the first time
On if she’s spoken to John Blizzard since scene with him at Villa Rosa "He texts still like random things like Happy “Birthday to Slate”…he’ll see it on my Instagram, but I haven’t responded”
Wed 3/20 Kyle & Teddi together and Rinna & Denise film the RHOBH After Show
Wed 3/20 In response to a someone on Twitter messaging her “Your kids will get bullied at school with a failure of a mother, Teddi replied “This isn’t shady, this is gross. But keep trolling. I’ll continue being a great mother to my amazing kiddos.”
Thurs 3/21 Brandi films RHOBH After Show
Thurs 3/21 In response to the accusations by fans that the cast didn’t care about Lucy, Rinna posts a 4 part Instagram story with the following text: (I asked…Is the dog dead or alive?) (They said…The dog is alive.)(I then said…what’s the big fucking deal?)(THE END.)
Fri 3/22 A fan account tweeted a video that PK posted (not sure when the original posting was or if he reposted it from an initial post) which shows Lucy climbing out of her dog pen as PK and Dorit observe and make comments.
Fri 3/22 Erika confessional with white, black, and red suit & hat
Fri 3/22 Dorit and PK post various videos and pics of Lucy in response to Teddi revealing in episode 6 the Lucy basement story that she was first told by Vanderpump Dogs employees
Sat 3/23 Fans noticed that both Kyle and Teddi follow Brandi on Instagram and vice versa
Mon 3/25 Erika on Ellen with Mila Kunis as host Erika “I know that she (LVP) stopped showing up midseason and so we were stuck looking at each other like so what’s going on” Mila “Have you talked to her since?” Erika “Nooooo, what are we gonna talk about?” Mila “Are you on Teddi’s side?” Erika “Yes. I’m on the truth’s side, and that’s the truth”
Mon 3/25 and Tues 3/26 Rinna cohosting Kelly and Ryan
Tues 3/26 Episode 7 “Eat, Drink, and be Married” airs.
Tues 3/26 Erika on WWHL. She says she believes LVP was behind the ROL article. When asked about her husband’s legal troubles impacting her spending habits, she replied “It’s a lawsuit, and I can’t comment on it. And I pay my own bills.” When asked why no one is talking about the fact that Dorit gave the dog to a random woman, Erika replied “I don’t’ think it is a random woman. I think it was someone that she knew. When asked why she took Dorit’s side over LVP, Erika replied “Well because there was no reason not to believe Dorit. She showed me the pictures and everything. A caller asked Erika what she thought about LVP’s confessional saying she was owed an apology, Erika replied “For that?” Andy replied “Accusing her I guess.” Erika replied “Oh no. I’m ok.” When Paul Scheer said that Camille was the worst housewife of all time, Erika notably did not come to her defense.
Tues 3/26 Teddi confessional with black plunging cut top
Tues 3/26 Episode 7 “Eat, Drink, and be Married” airs. Rinna, Teddi, and Denise write blogs.
Sat 3/30 LVP, Camille the VPR cast, and LVP’s nephews attend official opening of Vanderpump Cocktail in Las Vegas.
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2019.04.14 22:21 Wishful-Thought [activity][contest] RAOA Trivia Week 4 - It's Science Time Bitches!!

Congratulations to E=MC Hammer, our winners this week! There were 8 teams with a perfect score this week and you were selected by the randomiser! Please let me know whether you would like to receive a $5 prize each, or add your prize money to the winning pool!

Welcome to your third week of questions - Science and Nature!
There are ten questions to answer, and as usual, I'd like you to answer on this google form.
You have until next Sunday, the 21st, to submit your answers.

  1. What does USB stand for when used to describe the connection standard used between computers and smartphones and their devices?
  2. Which is the largest internal organ in the human body?
  3. Which type of creature is a Barramundi?
  4. In which century was Sir Isaac Newton born?
  5. Bill Gates is famous for being one of the founders of Microsoft, but who was the other co-founder?
  6. What is the collective noun used for a group of grasshoppers?
  7. Which two letters of the alphabet make up the chemical symbol for mercury?
  8. In which part of the human body would you find the atlas bone?
  9. Which noun is used for a ferret under one year old?
  10. What would a woman be suffering from if she had hirsutism?

PLEASE REMEMBER - This is NOT OPEN TO NEW TEAMS. My list of teams who signed up prior to today can be found here. If you're not on here, I did not receive your sign-up through the posted form.
You can only take part if you signed up as a team in the Week 1 Sign-ups and any answers from teams not on my spreadsheet before today are ineligible and I will be deleting them. I'm running this on my own so it will be hard enough to keep track of scores of teams signed up, without adding in new players each week.

For those interested, the answers to last week's questions can be seen below!
Jack Dorsey founded which social network in March 2006?
Twitter
In which British city might you find the Arndale Centre, The Trafford Centre or the Triangle?
Manchester
Actress Mila Kunis was born in which country?
Ukraine
At an airport, what does ATC stand for?
Air Traffic Control
ANZAC was a First World War army corps featuring soldiers from which two countries?
Australia and New Zealand
In architecture, which ‘AD’ term describes a popular 1930s design style featuring bold outlines and geometric shapes?
Art Deco
‘HOMES’ is a mnemonic for recalling the Five Great Lakes of the USA. Which lake does the ’S’ represent?
Superior
How many verses are there in total in the New Testament?
7957
On the road, ANPR might automatically detect and read your what?
Number plate
Lake Victoria, spanning Uganda, Tanzania and Kenya is the largest reservoir of which river?
The Nile
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2019.03.26 18:03 andreabartz I’m Andrea Bartz, the author of the debut thriller THE LOST NIGHT. AMA!

Hi, Reddit! I'm Andrea Bartz, the author of THE LOST NIGHT, a thriller that was published this February by Crown and optioned for TV by Cartel Entertainment, with Mila Kunis to produce. It's about a woman uncovering the dark truths surrounding her best friend's apparent suicide in a Brooklyn loft a decade earlier, and it delves deep into memory, technology, your invincible twenties, and the complexity of female friendships. I began writing it almost five years ago, and it's a dream come true to have it out in the world. I'm here to answer your questions about the novel, my writing process, or anything else you'd like to know, so AMA!
You can learn more about my book and see upcoming events here: http://AndreaBartz.com
Follow me on Twitter here: http://twitter.com/andibartz
Follow me on Instagram here: http://instagram.com/andibartz
Follow my Facebook page here: https://www.facebook.com/andreabartzautho
Proof: https://i.redd.it/hogabkaagjn21.jpg
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2018.07.12 04:25 voomoscato Sexual Pleasures During Sleep Paralysis

Hey y’all, I just created a reddit today because I really just had to share this weird, yet pleasurable experience? So it started a little something like this. It was about 12pm when I had woken up from my sleep. I layed in bed on my phone for almost two hours (it was a lazy day so why not), then I decided to take a nap. I tried to sleep, but I guess I went into this subconscious mode where a whole lot of different thoughts were just racing through my head, and I felt fully awake while I felt my body shutting down into sleep (I don’t know what this is called). Then. I found myself sleeping, and then realized I was asleep. I wasn’t dreaming anything at the time, so I thought to myself “oh shoot I’m sleeping, let me dream what I want now.” But for some reason my mind couldn’t come up with anything, and all I kept “dreaming/seeing” in my sleep was just pure blank blackness. Now, generally, I’m a very paranoid person and I tend to freak myself out a lot even in the smallest situations. I had lucid dreamed once before this occasion and I automatically freaked myself out and went into sleep paralysis. This is kinda what I did this time, except, when I freaked out, I kinda just forced myself to wake up from this lucid dream. Well... that didn’t go so well. When I opened my eyes from my lucid dream, I saw this small little black figure in the corner of my left eye, and I felt like I was being stared down on. This only freaked me out even more, so I tried to pull myself and sit up on my bed—but I literally couldn’t. I was stuck, and felt so weak whenever I tried to move. Suddenly, I felt as if this figure was making me fall back into sleep and I couldn’t do anything to stop it. So, I ended up falling asleep. I then felt myself going into this unconscious state where I couldn’t see anything in my sleep, but instead felt these strange touches all over my body. At first, they were touches on my legs and slowly started going more upwards my body. Then, I found myself feeling these pleasurable touches on my private area (ps I’m a 19 year old girl and am sexually active). Soon, I started getting turned on by these feelings I was receiving, that I sort of wanted more. Judge me if you want, but I sort of started demanding oral sex from whatever was touching me. I actually ended up receiving head and then I paused—- and reminded myself of something that I read on Twitter the other day. It was about how there’s this demon named Incubus that has sex with you during sleep. So, not surprisingly, I started to freak myself out and kept telling myself “No! This is what I read about on Twitter! This is a demon! Don’t buy into this!!” But for some reason... I couldn’t make myself turn away from these pleasures. It’s almost as if this figure I had seen earlier was the one doing this all to me, and it’s as if he was forcing this on me that I couldn’t stop. I then just let in to whatever this thing was doing to me, and even ended up feeling myself make out with it. At one point, I could literally feel my lower body moving up and down in my bed from how much pleasure I was having from receiving head. I was still in my sleep, but I could literally feel my body reacting as if I was about to have an orgasm- which I never did. I even felt my mouth doing the natural movements I would do if I was making out with someone, but once again, I couldn’t control this. I guess I was so aroused that I literally couldn’t listen to my own mind telling me to stop? Then something I didn’t like happened. I felt as if this entity wanted to have sex with me. I literally felt this figure spreading my legs open, and trying to get in between. At this point, I was scared and was automatically turned off. I guess the fact that I was no longer aroused due to this action, caused this entity to go away? And I know this because I soon found myself lucid dreaming again, but this time, it was scenarios that I actually liked and I felt like I could control them. I found myself dreaming of me doing things with a past lover, and then quickly getting bored of it. I soon found myself in a whole new location, a peer at an ocean or something. The only people there seemed to be me, this unknown guy, and Mila Kunis (I know right ???)! Soon, the unknown guy told me and Mila Kunis to makeout— and so we did! I guess I dreamt of Mila cus she’s attractive? But it’s weird cus I never ever think of her, and can’t remember the last time I even saw a post or something about her haha. Then I woke up from my sleep because my alarm clock went off. Now, my whole day I’ve felt like I’ve still been in a dream state, it’s weird. I’ve been feeling drowsy and clumsy, that I’ve been knocking things off of shelves by accident, and even cut myself while slicing a piece of cheese!! I then read that this incubus thing can suck the energy out of you, so my question is, was this incubus that I encountered, and if not, what was it? I know this whole thing was kinda weird, but I’m looking for an answer or some kind of advice. I really don’t want this to happen again.
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2018.07.11 04:43 PM-MEYOURDICKPICS Being called thin/skinny is no where near as demeaning as being called fat.

Skinny people can be picked on, but to say you get treated the same or even worse than fat people socially is a fucking stretch.
My own mother told me no one will love me when I'm fat and said I'm too fat to have body dysmorphic disorder at 14. My brother told me when I was 12 (he was 28) that "if only you lost weight you'd be so beautiful"
My dad told me he liked how I looked better when I didn't eat. I was 13. I was anorexic at 11.
Is there a "thin people hate" subreddit?
I was told "you're not allowed to be confident and happy, you're fat" multiple times. "You're beautiful, but you're fat so we can't date" "Why do you even wear makeup? You're fat, you'll always be ugly"
You see that photo of the black women in the red romper that's going around on twitter? If she was thin I'm 101% certain it wouldn't be as virtual as it is now, plain and simple. Fat people are always a joke to the internet and to the public.
Mila Kunis - Black Swan era, she was 90 pounds : 15 BMI, she was beautiful and everyone said she was beautiful. Name me one person who said she was ugly. Google "I hate fat people" see what shows up, then google "I hate thin people"
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2017.11.04 18:56 pretzel Summary of Non-Political Late Night Clips from 2017-10-28 to 2017-11-04

Summary of Non-Political Late Night Clips from 2017-10-28 to 2017-11-04

Chats

Extras

Audience Participations

Desk Pieces

Guest Stand Ups

Promos

Parodies

Field Pieces

Activities

2017-10-30 2017-10-31 2017-11-01 2017-11-02
James Corden Nate That Tune w/ The Shins / Carpool Karaoke: The Series — LeBron James & James Corden Carpool Karaoke w/ Sam Smith ft. Fifth Harmony
Jimmy Fallon Caramel Apple Russian Roulette with Blake Shelton Breaking Thor with Chris Hemsworth Dance Battle with the Stranger Things Kids
Conan O'Brien Stream Coco LIVE: “Assassin’s Creed Origins” Clueless Gamer: Assassin’s Creed Origins" — Extended Gameplay Edition

Monologues

2017-10-30 2017-11-01 2017-11-02
Jimmy Kimmel Shaq's Guest Host Monologue on Jimmy Kimmel Live Channing Tatum's Guest Host Monologue on Jimmy Kimmel Live / Jimmy Kimmel Tells His Daughter He Ate All Her Halloween Candy Jennifer Lawrence's Guest Host Monologue on Jimmy Kimmel Live
Conan O'Brien Halloween Safety Tips From Hacky Dracula Papa John’s New Kneeling Pizza / Stranger Things” Season 2 Has Too Many ‘80s References
Jimmy Fallon Trump's Cut Cut Cut Act, Lady Gaga Got Engaged
Seth Meyers Trump's "Cut Cut Cut Act," Starbucks' Holiday Cups The Houston Astros' World Series Win, Fried Chicken-Scented Bath Bombs

Skits

2017-10-30 2017-10-31 2017-11-01 2017-11-02
Jimmy Kimmel Commercial for Captain Morgan with Guillermo / Shaq's New Movie Based on Viral Baby Video / Hey Jimmy Kimmel, I Ate All My Kid's Halloween Candy / Guillermo Messes with Guest Host Shaq Hey Jimmy Kimmel, I Told My Kids I Ate All Their Halloween Candy / Guest Host Dave Grohl Takes Over Jimmy Kimmel's Office Guest Host Channing Tatum Asks Kids for Advice / Channing Tatum Tells His Daughter He Ate All Her Halloween Candy / Guest Host Channing Tatum Dances His Way onto Kimmel Commercial for Star Wars Battlefront II with Guillermo / Guest Host Jennifer Lawrence Loves to Curse / YouTube Challenge - I Told My Kids I Ate All Their Halloween Candy 2017
Stephen Colbert Late Show 'Rescue Dog Rescue' With Billy Eichner Nicole Kidman: Big Questions With Even Bigger Stars
James Corden Reggie Keeps Scaring James Corden on Halloween Thor: Ragnarok 4D w/ the 'Thor' Cast
Conan O'Brien Scraps: World's Best Dad Butterscotch The Clown’s Halloween Plans New York’s New Yorkiest Actor Wants To Be Part Of #ConanNYC / A Dodgers Fan Chose CONAN Over The World Series
Jimmy Fallon Popular Mathematics: Hockey Player + Candy + Donald Trump = Jack-o'-Lantern / Jimmy Unveils the New Tonight Show Ben & Jerry's "Secret Stash" Flavor

Performances

2017-10-30 2017-10-31 2017-11-01 2017-11-02 2017-11-03
Seth Meyers Imagine Dragons: "Whatever It Takes" Blake Shelton: "Turnin' Me On"
Jimmy Kimmel Ty Dolla $ign's EXCLUSIVE Off-Air Performances Kristen Bell & Dave Grohl Perform Frozen & Metallica Mash-Up Alice Cooper Performs "Ballad of Dwight Fry" and "Killer" Medley with Foo Fighters Linkin' Bridge Performs "Drift Away" / Linkin' Bridge Performs "The War"
Stephen Colbert Weezer Performs 'Happy Hour' Thundercat Performs 'Them Changes' With Jon Batiste & Stay Human Courtney Barnett And Kurt Vile Perform 'Over Everything' / Courtney Barnett & Kurt Vile Perform 'Continental Breakfast' Kelsea Ballerini Performs 'I Hate Love Songs'
James Corden Fergie: A Little Work / Drop the Mic w/ Method Man Gary Clark Jr.: Come Together
Jimmy Fallon Kelly Clarkson Sings "Since U Been Gone" ("Gone Been U Since") Backwards Kelly Clarkson: Whole Lotta Woman Elbow: Magnificent (She Says) / Elbow: One Day Like This / Maroon 5 ft. SZA: What Lovers Do
Conan O'Brien Dhani Harrison “All About Waiting” JB Smoove Gives Conan Advice About Performing At The Ap King Krule "Dum Surfer" 11/02/17

Interviews

2017-10-30 2017-10-31 2017-11-01 2017-11-02
Seth Meyers Heidi Klum Reveals Her Dream Guest Judge for Project Runway / Heidi Klum Has Been Planning Her Halloween Costume Since June Anthony Bourdain Was Labeled a Mossad Agent by Romanian Newspapers / Anthony Bourdain Apologized for Perpetuating "Meathead Culture" in Cuisine / Aya Cash's Neighbor Terrorized Her with a Giant Bunny Blake Shelton's Singing Did Not Impress Kelly Clarkson / Blake Shelton Wrote a Song for Gwen Stefani / Todd Barry's #FreeStuffForTodd Twitter Campaign Has Had Mixed Results Rosie O'Donnell's Natural Gray Hair Is a Blessing and a Curse
Jimmy Kimmel Guest Host Shaq Interviews Mila Kunis Guest Host Dave Grohl Interviews Kristen Bell Guest Host Channing Tatum Interviews P!nk / Guest Host Channing Tatum Interviews Ellen DeGeneres / Guest Host Dave Grohl Interviews Alice Cooper Guest Host Jennifer Lawrence Interviews Kim Kardashian West / P!nk's Husband Told Their Daughter He Ate All Her Halloween Candy
Stephen Colbert Billy Eichner Is A Banana Who Hates The President / Anna Camp Describes Her 'Pitch Perfect' Marriage Mark Ruffalo Live-Streamed An Early 'Thor' Screening / Gilbert Gottfried Is In A Documentary About Gilbert Gottfried Jonathan Groff Presents 'Mindhunter: The Musical' / Nicole Kidman Forgot Stephen Was Also In 'Bewitched' Kathryn Hahn Started Celebrating Christmas In May
James Corden Miles Teller & Whitney Cummings Try Ostrich Pillows / Whitney Cummings Has a Problem w/ Men's Pants Hanging Out w/ Fish & Jan-Bone/Jan-Tastic Mila Kunis Bailed on World Series Game 7 for James / Young Sheldon Got Jim Parsons an Ant Farm Kristen Bell & 'Bad Moms' Invaded The Price is Right / Dianna Agron Met the Wrong Mosquito at Her Wedding
Jimmy Fallon Andrea Martin Impersonates Nicole Richie's "Chill" Style / Jimmy Surprises Blake Shelton with a Serenade of "I'll Name the Dogs" Millie Bobby Brown Gets Goosebumps from Her Season 2 Stranger Things Kiss / Millie Bobby Brown Is Freaked Out by Grown Men Dressing Up as Eleven / Millie Bobby Brown Is Obsessed with the Kardashians' Special Language / Millie Bobby Brown Raps a Stranger Things Season 1 Recap Chris Hemsworth Sinks an Epic Full-Court Basketball Shot / Chris Hemsworth Explains Thor's Unexpected Ragnarok Haircut / Kelly Clarkson and Jimmy Remember the First Time They Met on The Tonight Show José Altuve on Hurricane Harvey's Impact on Houston Astros' World Series Win / The Boys of Stranger Things Are Obsessed with High School Musical / Alec Baldwin Forgot to Thank SNL's Hair and Makeup for His Trump Transformation / Lindsey Vonn Makes Jimmy Model an Official USA Winter Olympic Onesie
Conan O'Brien Nathan Fielder Brought Susan Sarandon As A Back-Up Guest / Anna Faris Interviews Conan & Andy / Dr. Anna Faris Is An Adjunct Professor At USC / Nathan Fielder Brought Susan Sarandon As A Back-Up Guest Conan & Andy Play Whitney Cummings’ Dating Game / Whitney Cummings On Online Dating / JB Smoove Explains The Storied History Of The Phrase "Get In Dat Ass” Mila Kunis Sold Unlicensed *NSYNC Merch On eBay / Maria Bamford Used Her Commencement Speech Earnings To Pay Off Students’ Loans / Maria Bamford’s Relationship Advice / Mila Kunis & Conan Chew On Bourbon / Mila Kunis Donated To Planned Parenthood In Vice President Mike Pence’s Name / Frank Grillo Is A Superstar In China / Frank Grillo’s New Movie Has More F-Bombs Than “Scarface” / Kristen Bell Got Filthy With Her “Frozen” Action Figure / Beth Stelling Is Building Up Her Meat Coat / Kristen Bell Likes Big Juicy Buns
submitted by pretzel to LateNightClips [link] [comments]


2017.06.15 02:00 rhymebase Reply to TW1971's one-liner: "Almost all of them, and no on remembers any more, what the context was in the first place" on ::askreddit

Author: TW1971
Full Comment: "Almost all of them, and no on remembers any more, what the context was in the first place."
Last Sentence: "Almost all of them, and no on remembers any more, what the context was in the first place"
Comment: Link
Submission: What line from the Bible sounds really wrong when taken out of context ?
Rhyme In Video Start Duration
Are they aiming for his face (Kids React to Top Soccer Shootout Ever With Scott Sterling) 142.672s 2.279s
in the matter of time and space. (TEENS REACT TO DOCTOR WHO) 560.088s 3.174s
But shortly before graduating my teacher Tom told me quotLook you have a massive fan base (The Story of Animator vs. Animation - 10 Year Anniversary) 368.83s 5.32s
and you should put systems in place. (How to stay calm when you know you'll be stressed - Daniel Levitin) 353.36s 2.296s
You want to race (Talking Blocks: Minecarts (Minecraft Animation)) 21.58s 1.64s
I DON39T NEED TO HANG MY STOCKING THERE UPON THE FIREPLACE ('All I Want for Christmas' Carpool Karaoke) 95.666s 6.367s
I39m all about the bass (Kids React to Meghan Trainor - All About That Bass) 124.494s 1.468s
What39s happening in your mindright now Sophia Grace (Mila Kunis on Being a New Mom) 259.566s 2.367s
Why do you think that is the case (Elders React to Shakira - Can't Remember To Forget You ft. Rihanna) 414.552s 1.535s
ltigt When you travel you probablyltigtltigtpack panties in your suitcase (8 Mile (6/10) Movie CLIP - The Lunch Truck (2002) HD) 66.578s 2.695s
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2017.06.15 01:31 rhymebase Reply to ifeelhome's one-liner: "My favorite customer service companies: USAA, Southwest Airlines, Chase" on ::askreddit

Author: ifeelhome
Full Comment: "My favorite customer service companies: USAA, Southwest Airlines, Chase."
Last Sentence: "My favorite customer service companies: USAA, Southwest Airlines, Chase"
Comment: Link
Submission: What is the best example of customer service you've ever experienced?
Video Title Rhyme In Video Start Duration
Kids React to Top Soccer Shootout Ever With Scott Sterling Are they aiming for his face 142.672s 2.279s
TEENS REACT TO DOCTOR WHO in the matter of time and space. 560.088s 3.174s
The Story of Animator vs. Animation - 10 Year Anniversary But shortly before graduating my teacher Tom told me quotLook you have a massive fan base 368.83s 5.32s
How to stay calm when you know you'll be stressed - Daniel Levitin and you should put systems in place. 353.36s 2.296s
Talking Blocks: Minecarts (Minecraft Animation) You want to race 21.58s 1.64s
'All I Want for Christmas' Carpool Karaoke I DON39T NEED TO HANG MY STOCKING THERE UPON THE FIREPLACE 95.666s 6.367s
Kids React to Meghan Trainor - All About That Bass I39m all about the bass 124.494s 1.468s
Mila Kunis on Being a New Mom What39s happening in your mindright now Sophia Grace 259.566s 2.367s
Elders React to Shakira - Can't Remember To Forget You ft. Rihanna Why do you think that is the case 414.552s 1.535s
8 Mile (6/10) Movie CLIP - The Lunch Truck (2002) HD ltigt When you travel you probablyltigtltigtpack panties in your suitcase 66.578s 2.695s
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Mike Johnson Jr (resume) is looking for a software development job. If you like the rhymebase bot and Rhymebase, please help Mike find a job.
Rhymebase on Facebook - Rhymebase on Twitter
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2017.06.15 01:18 rhymebase Reply to therealdoubleh's last sentence: " The terror of trying to find an object to hold on to would jolt me awake and to this day if I have to drive up a steep incline (not down, strangely) my heart starts to race" on ::askreddit

Author: therealdoubleh
Full Comment: "I'll start, I had a frequently recurring dream that the sidewalk or street I was on would raise up like a bridge (over water, like for boat passing) from underneath me until it's straight up and I fall off. The terror of trying to find an object to hold on to would jolt me awake and to this day if I have to drive up a steep incline (not down, strangely) my heart starts to race."
Last Sentence: "The terror of trying to find an object to hold on to would jolt me awake and to this day if I have to drive up a steep incline (not down, strangely) my heart starts to race"
Comment: Link
Submission: What recurring dream from childhood has stuck with you, potentially influencing your life today?
Video Title Rhyme In Video Start Duration
Kids React to Top Soccer Shootout Ever With Scott Sterling Are they aiming for his face 142.672s 2.279s
TEENS REACT TO DOCTOR WHO in the matter of time and space. 560.088s 3.174s
The Story of Animator vs. Animation - 10 Year Anniversary But shortly before graduating my teacher Tom told me quotLook you have a massive fan base 368.83s 5.32s
How to stay calm when you know you'll be stressed - Daniel Levitin and you should put systems in place. 353.36s 2.296s
Talking Blocks: Minecarts (Minecraft Animation) You want to race 21.58s 1.64s
'All I Want for Christmas' Carpool Karaoke I DON39T NEED TO HANG MY STOCKING THERE UPON THE FIREPLACE 95.666s 6.367s
Kids React to Meghan Trainor - All About That Bass I39m all about the bass 124.494s 1.468s
Mila Kunis on Being a New Mom What39s happening in your mindright now Sophia Grace 259.566s 2.367s
Elders React to Shakira - Can't Remember To Forget You ft. Rihanna Why do you think that is the case 414.552s 1.535s
8 Mile (6/10) Movie CLIP - The Lunch Truck (2002) HD ltigt When you travel you probablyltigtltigtpack panties in your suitcase 66.578s 2.695s
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2017.06.15 01:17 rhymebase Reply to msjollly's one-liner: "Sex while flying" on ::askreddit

Author: msjollly
Full Comment: "Sex while flying."
Last Sentence: "Sex while flying"
Comment: Link
Submission: A super hero/villain gets bored and wants YOU to suggest something fun and interesting to do. What would it be?
Video Title Rhyme In Video Start Duration
YouTubers React to Oddly UNsatisfying Compilation Very satisfying 170.53s 2.353s
TEENS REACT TO ATTACK ON TITAN They can freaking terrifying. 383.842s 2.127s
Why do we cry? The three types of tears - Alex Gendler As Onion walks out the doorIris stops crying. 159.522s 2.788s
YouTubers React to Oddly UNsatisfying Compilation and the polish is in your cuticles.That39s really unsatisfying. 370.267s 3.331s
Bread Potato Rolls Recipe by Manjula, Indian Vegetarian Appetizers Otherwise it will soak more oil while you are frying. 291.42s 3.36s
ELDERS PLAY THE LAST OF US (Elders React: Gaming) Okay this is really horrifying. 899.633s 3.165s
Kristen Bell and Mila Kunis Talk Kids gtgt You39re trying. 97.83s 0.94s
La Prima Pasta Corta Crudista (Raw Food) - Fruttariana: Maccheroni, Penne, Ecc. - DI CBE This is the pasta after drying 463.1s 4.5s
HAPPY WHEELS (Elders React: Gaming) 39You are DEAD39. No bleep. My brain39s flying. 367.36s 3.92s
ELDERS REACT TO RAMMSTEIN (German Metal Band) music intensifying 300.896s 4.3s
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2017.06.15 01:11 rhymebase Reply to User_5098213's one-liner: "when i was lucid and flying" on ::askreddit

Author: User_5098213
Full Comment: "when i was lucid and flying"
Last Sentence: "when i was lucid and flying"
Comment: Link
Submission: What is the best dream you've ever had?
Video Title Rhyme In Video Start Duration
YouTubers React to Oddly UNsatisfying Compilation Very satisfying 170.53s 2.353s
TEENS REACT TO ATTACK ON TITAN They can freaking terrifying. 383.842s 2.127s
Why do we cry? The three types of tears - Alex Gendler As Onion walks out the doorIris stops crying. 159.522s 2.788s
YouTubers React to Oddly UNsatisfying Compilation and the polish is in your cuticles.That39s really unsatisfying. 370.267s 3.331s
Bread Potato Rolls Recipe by Manjula, Indian Vegetarian Appetizers Otherwise it will soak more oil while you are frying. 291.42s 3.36s
ELDERS PLAY THE LAST OF US (Elders React: Gaming) Okay this is really horrifying. 899.633s 3.165s
Kristen Bell and Mila Kunis Talk Kids gtgt You39re trying. 97.83s 0.94s
La Prima Pasta Corta Crudista (Raw Food) - Fruttariana: Maccheroni, Penne, Ecc. - DI CBE This is the pasta after drying 463.1s 4.5s
HAPPY WHEELS (Elders React: Gaming) 39You are DEAD39. No bleep. My brain39s flying. 367.36s 3.92s
ELDERS REACT TO RAMMSTEIN (German Metal Band) music intensifying 300.896s 4.3s
Brought to you by Rhymebase. Official Subreddit: /rhymebase. Logs: /rhymebase_logs
Mike Johnson Jr (resume) is looking for a software development job. If you like the rhymebase bot and Rhymebase, please help Mike find a job.
Rhymebase on Facebook - Rhymebase on Twitter
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2017.06.14 07:50 rhymebase Reply to Fennels's one-liner: "Have you seriously never heard about the dicks race?" on ::askreddit

Author: Fennels
Full Comment: "Have you seriously never heard about the dicks race?"
Last Sentence: "Have you seriously never heard about the dicks race?"
Comment: Link
Submission: what are some legitimate reasons for the US to have faked the moon landing?
Video Title Rhyme In Video Start Duration
Kids React to Top Soccer Shootout Ever With Scott Sterling Are they aiming for his face 142.672 2.279
TEENS REACT TO DOCTOR WHO in the matter of time and space. 560.088 3.174
The Story of Animator vs. Animation - 10 Year Anniversary But shortly before graduating my teacher Tom told me quotLook you have a massive fan base 368.83 5.32
How to stay calm when you know you'll be stressed - Daniel Levitin and you should put systems in place. 353.36 2.296
Talking Blocks: Minecarts (Minecraft Animation) You want to race 21.58 1.64
'All I Want for Christmas' Carpool Karaoke I DON39T NEED TO HANG MY STOCKING THERE UPON THE FIREPLACE 95.666 6.367
Kids React to Meghan Trainor - All About That Bass I39m all about the bass 124.494 1.468
Mila Kunis on Being a New Mom What39s happening in your mindright now Sophia Grace 259.566 2.367
Elders React to Shakira - Can't Remember To Forget You ft. Rihanna Why do you think that is the case 414.552 1.535
8 Mile (6/10) Movie CLIP - The Lunch Truck (2002) HD ltigt When you travel you probablyltigtltigtpack panties in your suitcase 66.578 2.695
How to speak so that people want to listen - Julian Treasure Of course pitch oftengoes along with pace 403.823 2.304
Paw Patrol Racers Marshall Chase Rubble Zuma Rocky Skye Nickelodeon - Unboxing Demo Review There39s Chase 192.49 1
Taylor Swift - New Romantics BUT I39M ABOUTTO PLAY MY ACE 92.2 2.6
What if 3D printing was 100x faster? - Joseph DeSimone In addition as our abilityto deliver liquid to that interface 368.17 4.336
[ENG SUB] French REACTION to TWICE "SIGNAL" M/V It39s an UFO trace 36.02 1.14
Should we eat bugs? - Emma Bryce fried and sold in the marketplace. 122.344 2.094
ELDERS REACT TO QUEEN You big disgrace 70.505 1.603
Teens React to J-pop What39s in the briefcase 52.858 1.428
Why do cats act so weird? - Tony Buffington but instinctually viewing the living roomfrom the top of the bookcase 90.887 3.47
Steaming a 12 Pound Red Snapper - Steaming a Big Fish - Steaming a Fish in Our Village Adding curry leaves ginger garlic cloves cardamom bay leaves cinnamon star anise and mace 265.74 6.64
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2017.06.05 14:16 newthrooawayyy We need to contact influencers and celebrities to #BringBackSense8

After seeing that Melissa Etheridge retweeted our hashtag, it occurred to me that we should come up with a list of celebrities who might support our cause and reach out to them through social media or otherwise. If they decide to retweet us or post on Facebook, Instagram, or otherwise, then that'll help us reach way more followers. Let's look for people who are obviously LGBT-friendly and/or worked on a movie with the Wachowskis and J Michael Straczynski to start with.
Let's call on the archipelago and do this.
Here is a list of people to reach out to. I'll update it as people post.
Note: Those who don't have an official page on Twitter (does not tweet) may have Twitter fanpages or other social media. Feel free to add those in as well.
Edit 1: Thank you all so much for the attention! If you have the time, please also check out kanda_92 's topic on getting Sense8 trending on FineBros/React!
Edit 2: You guys have been great! StaringNight69 suggested that we share this page with the Sense8 Twitter and Tumblr accounts, so I am linking them below along with Facebook. I am signing off of Reddit for the day but feel free to keep posting new names and coming up with ideas. They wanted a war? They got a war.
Sense8 Pages
Sense8 Main Cast
Actors and actresses who worked with the Wachowskis
LGBT-friendly influencers
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